Shark Swarm (2008)

Surprisingly not terrible. This made-for-TV action-horror-thriller has a good amount of shark kills and blood, especially for the ultra-gooey, super-sappy Hallmark Channel. I didn't know going into this that it was 2 hours and 38 minutes long (apparently shown in two parts over two nights on television.) When I finally glanced at the time on the DVD player, it showed 1:52 and we were nowhere near wrapping it up yet! Okay, if the time passed by that easily it must not be that horrible. John Schneider (Bo Duke) was actually really good. Darryl Hannah meh. Armand Assante was in his element in a stereotypical bad guy role. Lots of blood but little gore but still like 2 to 3 dozen kills. But why was no one concerned all these people were going missing?!?! Not exactly the most well-written script but I have seen much, much worse. Production value is better than I expected. Anything on Syfy Channel would have been pure trash. This actually rises to the top of the trash can.4.8 / 10 stars--Zoooma, a Kat Pirate Screener

The previous reviews pretty much summed up my feelings about this really bad movie, so I'll just add a few more tidbits that might further encourage you not to watch it. Lots of people killed by sharks and nobody misses them. Shark attacks and dead sharks on the beach and no shark warnings to keep people out of the water. Everyone who falls into the ocean gets eaten by sharks except the stars of the movie. This movie was so bad I stopped watching it 30 minutes before the ending. I'm guessing the ending was "sharks destroyed, boy gets girl, everyone lives happily ever after". 4 hours was about 240 minutes too long. What a waste of my time.

Lol. This film is so bad - its funny.Tedious. Predictable. Bad writing. Clichéd crap.The sharks form swarms to attack humans like piranhas. The funny thing is that no one seems to notice the people getting killed. No MIA reports. No washed up body parts.When they finally realize the sharks have gone insane. No one bothers to get the police or coast guard to warn the beachcombers.Just watch this on fast forward. Watch the funny parts. Watch this esp. if you are going for your Open Water Padi dive - its hilarious. In the Gallow humor way.

I knew this was going to be a bomb when the first shark attack reminded me of a video game from a few generations back it was so completely phony. Granted it was made for TV so it couldn't be as realistic as "Jaws", but my goodness this is now on my top 10 for worst movies I have ever seen.The basic premise, as usual, is the bad guy, Armand Assante wants to build a multi-million dollar condominium complex in this little town on the California coast. Most of the residents are all for the idea because the "fishing has dried up" and the economy is in the toilet. Only Daniel and his family are holding out.Apparently The Bad Guy has deliberately contaminated the water to destroy the fishing in the hopes that everybody in the town will wish to sell to him (ho-hum). Unfortunately there seems to be a nasty side effect of this poisonous water: The sharks get bigger, meaner and start bonding together! OMG! Can you guess how The Bad Guy dies at the end?? The scenes were so disjointed; one minute it's sunrise but in the next scene it's still dinnertime. These people all knew about the shark attacks; well maybe most don't because nobody I saw eaten was ever reported missing including a daycare worker and yet THEY STILL GO IN THE WATER! We have people swimming, scuba diving, surfboarding, having a water Baptism, you name it, they were doing it the water. And while it appeared to be cold enough that some were wearing sweaters and wetsuits & you could see their breath, people right up the beach were in bathing suits and splashing in the surf. People are being eaten and murdered and some of the characters start making out after a near death experience.Have you figured out yet that this is a stinker of a movie? Who makes these things? Worse yet, who approves these movies? A Junior High kid who has played Donkey Kong a few too many times? If you're desperate to see people eaten by sharks go watch Jaws (the original) and don't waste 3 hours of your precious life on this drivel. The actors and actresses should not have even got paid for this movie, they should be sending US checks for watching it.