2012 (2009)

If you want dazzling special effects, zero reasons to use your brain for 2 solid hours and a desire to see humans being destroyed by mother nature's fury this is the movie to see. To give it credit 2012 doesn't try to be anything but a high budget CGI fest appealing to the lowest common denominator and as such it should make a killing at the box office worldwide. John Cusack, Woody Harrellson(relishing scenery chewing here) and Danny Glover are all on hand to collect a paycheck for standing or running in front of green screens- depending on your temperament 2012 is your call.

This movie had the potential to be one of the greatest, if maybe not , the greatest apocalyptic movie of all time. It had all the prepositions, especially the story it was based on, since everyone in that period of time was starting to worry about the D-day and what the Mayans said about the year 2012- the year when the world and our existence would be destroyed. It had a huge budget, the visuals were meant to be and are AMAZING, crazy good, as I would like to say eye-watering, BUT, at some moments, they were used to much, almost every 3 minutes which led to the movie losing depth, losing rhythm, losing logic. The casting choice was also mistaken pretty bad, especially with the leading role John Cusack, who, altho is one of the finest actors, brought to much comedy, without taking any matter seriously, which is not logical at any means, since the ground below him is dissapearing while he is making jokes about it.

I really don't know why I felt like I had to watch this train wreck. I guess just to say I got through it.I knew it would be idiotic, but I thought at least it might be fun, and it could have been if they'd kept it to a reasonable length. They didn't have enough ideas to fill a two and a half hour movie, so they just ended up repeating things: cars driving over crumbling roadways, planes taking off from crumbling runways, big waves coming in, etc. There were really only a handful of things that kept happening over and over again. The special effects were considered pretty impressive when the movie came out, but less than ten years later, they just look cheap and fake, and the whole thing feels like you're watching someone else play a video game. Too bad to be good, and too full of itself to be "so bad it's good". Just a waste of two and a half hours.

Dialogue was comically poor. But just before the 5 minute mark the premise is revealed and it was so terrible I gave up and stopped watching.SPOILER (Literally)The neutrinos from the sun have mutated and turned into a new kind of particle that acts like a microwave. Deep underground they reveal a column of water boiling away merrily ...... humans, obviously, not affected... hot dogs not slowly cooking in their packets... microwave popcorn isn't jumping off supermarket shelves... water anywhere else on the planet just fine...... no... only water deep underground in a neutrino detection pool is boiling. Because ... well ...neutrinos. underground. stuff.So the sun is now a microwave and the eaths core is cooking, water is boiling, but only in special places ... and blood isn't.The fact that I just paid to rent this movie is starting to boil my urine. Avoid, it's a complete crock. For the budget you'd think they'd hire someone with a red pen, to strike out all the utter garbage in the script. It would have worked just as well with something a little more credible ...... like a huge coronal discharge ... or a sudden increase in heat output generally ... or zombie teddy-bears with nasty burny lazer eyesIn the end I chose to stop the movie and re-watch weekend at bernies.