High Tension (2005)

I just don't understand the appeal of these movies.The movie is exactly what it looks to be, its yet another in like a million movies where people are being chased by a crazed killer. Yawn.I gave it actually better than I usually would because its pretty well shot. But in the end its just another slasher flick - if you like them this may be for you but if you need, like, a plot or something interesting then pass.

I knew this film would be bad when I saw 5 minutes in the little boy in a Wild Wild West cowboy costume, going "bam, bam, bam!" with a toy gun. How cliché. Was I supposed to go "awww, how cute, not the little boy!" as soon as I saw him, because the freaking writer was too lazy to develop his personality and his relationship with his family so I can build some sentiment for him? But I managed to convince myself for the 80 other minutes I sat through that the movie would be as mind-blowing as all these gimps and fools saying it would be. I downloaded the film and cut the movie off 10 minutes before it finished and now I can't wait to get my 640MB of RAM back.Well you were all wrong. I wish when the movie came out that I wasn't 12 years old and American or I would've seen the film and right away reviewed it and boycotted outside of the theaters for everyone to turn away as quickly as possible and save their ticket money for their bills instead.The deep country backdrop is ugly. It put me off it from the beginning but I kept on watching. It's lazy for a choice of scenery as well, because you see that setting so much in horror films, particularly around the time it came out. It's also cheap to use the high corn stalks as a mystery tactic when they foolishly wander in and get lost. "Oh my goodness! Will she come out alive?!" No, I didn't think that, sorry Mr. Director Guy. The secluded location of the house is annoyingly typical of a very bad idea for a tiny family of middle-aged parents, a small child and a chauvinistically thin, young daughter too incapable to defend themselves to live in, as individuals and as a unit. And now these feeble fools are in the middle of nowhere. We already know where this is gonna lead. The excuse of it being "idyllic" and a "place to get away and relax (while 'studying', the least relaxing thing ever)" doesn't work with me.But, again, I continue to squash these blatant facts like nagging cockroaches littered all over my common sense. And alas I keep watching.So never mind the weak force of the plot twist, but even without it this movie is the least heart-pounding "thriller" I've seen in a while. Because the whole time I'm vaguely wondering how this female (the daughter's friend) has survived all these attacks especially after witnessing the serial killer commit them while she's spectating in the worst hiding places ever: under the bed, in the closet, in a public bathroom stall, and in the back of THE serial killer's truck. I'm left to think this guy is the least diligent serial killer out there, which makes this whole poop-show very anti-climactic as it continues. Not good. She also took dammit forever to try and save anyone, which might play into the plot-twist, but it was still aggravating and discouraging to continue the film seeing her be so weak-minded and jelly-kneed.And here I am wanting a kickass heroine or a legendary female villain. And I get a stereotypically butch lesbian (cropped haircut, smokes, thumb ring, hoodie, and muscles) who ironically has a disappointingly weak swing and bad ideas and easy-flowing tears, so it really ruins any chances for her to succeed as the "cool tough chick" she's meant to be compared to her look, which seems like a contrived vision of the (casting) director. On top of that she's up against a stereotypically gruff man playing the serial killer. And he outsmarts her every which way she goes, which is upsetting since I was rooting for her, but it also wasn't surprising seeing how I definitely wouldn't want my life in this girl's hands, even if she didn't end up to be the bad guy. In the meantime, there was no feeling of intensity because the slue of hackneyed murders started so unprecedentedly, due to lazy screen writing. I promise: The only "conversation" the writer bothered to include in between the girls arriving and the murder was: "Did your friend get settled?"First off, to any aspiring horror writer who thinks this movie could serve as a blueprint, let alone Mr. Director Who Bit Off More Than He Could Chew By Also Being the Writer: Did her "friend" get settled? I'm sorry but if you're not running a Bed and Breakfast and are a host to a visitor who's meant to be a family friend and you're letting them stay for days in your home...I'd like to think you'd want to get to know them a bit and ask them yourself if they're settled in fine. OR even better you know them already considering your own child is bringing them for miles outside of civilisation to stay with you... But "did your friend get settled in?" is a bold and insulting indication that the writer didn't give a crap to at least show the visitor and the family and her friend having a nice character-developing and bond-creating discussion over the non-existent welcome home dinner... As far as the skip-a-beat excuse of a transition between the girls arriving and the "action": It literally goes from laughs and giggles between the girls unpacking in the bedroom literally to the doorbell ringing and kapow--foolish murder ensues. But all is well in the end because of the plot twist, right? Wrong.Ugh, whatever, just lame. This is what happens when you copy off of American Hollywood films!!!!The only thing I got from this film was a consolidation of me always telling myself: "Never open the door for a stranger." Not that they could hear me screaming it at the computer screen.

Alexandra Aja (The Hills Have Eyes 2006) directs this French-made gore-fest combining atmospheric tension with an excellent twist that will satisfy the torture porn audiences that loved films such as "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 20003" and "Hostel" that earmarked horror of the new millennium. This intense film follows the relationship of two females, Marie and Alexa, who decide to take a vacation at Alexa's parents country house which is eventually invaded by a big stomping weirdo in coveralls that seems to effortlessly slash everyone he comes across with no remorse. One of the girls is taken hostage in a really creepy old truck and the body count rises as the girls must play hide and seek in the traditional slasher film style. I do not want to give away the twist-ending, but its worth the trouble for gore and blood fans.This is the typical horror/gore movie. It includes graphically violent murder scenes, really bad French/English dubbing throughout at least half the film, and panic-induced girls running through the woods and hiding under the bed being chased by what seems to be the run-of-the-mills blood-soaked serial killer in overalls. Its illogical and goes against all laws of physics, but the direction is above average, and the tension is high (hence the title). Its a sick and twisted ride through the bizarre and impossible, but audiences of shock value flicks will appreciate its stimulation. You have been warned. Take it or leave it.

My best friend Amy is a lesbian. She dates guys once in awhile, but she truly loves women. She doesn't wear her hair short, and she likes pretty dresses, high heels, and lip gloss. She wasn't the stereotypical lesbian that "High Tension's" Marie was at all. Now having said all that, I really think Alex should have bought the clue that not only was her closest pal a lesbian, but Marie was rocking a major crush on her. Perhaps she did know, yet chose to tease Marie. Teasing is not nice. Teasing can get you killed…The film begins with two girls in the car on a road trip listening to what ends up being an amazing soundtrack. (…and by the way, yes, girls do sing like that in the car when we're alone together) Alex and Marie make their way to mom and dad's for the night when madness ensues. I recall feeling sickeningly claustrophobic during the bathroom scene, and as the apt title suggests, the tension was insurmountable. The effects of the kills were exceptional, but I had to wonder if the cut would be quite so clean regarding an occurrence on the stairs. With the exception of a couple masturbation scenes, the sexuality of this film, which could have been overt, actually faded like an afterthought. This was a film about mental illness and personality struggle with an inner beast. It was also a fairly twisted love story. This is a bona fide horror film, however, but it's more on par with "May" than "MSP". It has a unique mood and the horror is entirely plot driven sans utter nastiness, with the exception of one very memorable instrumental kill and a corn field scene involving a child. Some say that they predicted the twist, but I really didn't. Regardless, the story's concrete and Aja's direction is solid. The setting of the house was a light hearted innocence, hearkening to the country days of leaving your door unlocked and inviting in a stranger for a home cooked meal and use of your phone if needed. The blood spattered floors gave a sharp contrast to that warm splendor of rural life. Lighting and the fleeting blue tones in the truck scenes were remarkable. I could sense the despair and chill of the cold steel pressing persistently on raw wrists and bare thighs.This film ranks in my top ten horror favorites and as always, all subs no dubs- Enjoy! Your pal Creepie Suzie P.S. If you have already seen this movie… just imagine if there was no twist! What is would pale to what could have been and this film could have been one amazingly deranged, dirty, and completely scummy slasher flick. Ahhhhhhh… what could have been… if only. Regardless though, it's not a bad little piece of cerebral horror cinema as it stands.