Boogie Woogie (2009)

This film is about a group of buyers, dealers, workers and creators in the art world."Boogie Woogie" tells the story of the superficial and pretentious group of people in the art scene in London. The plot follows a dealer who tries to buy a painting, a manager who wants to open an art gallery, a video artist who films everything and a wealthy couple who does not bat an eyelid when paying millions for a painting. The numerous characters are somewhat connected, but they feel more like characters in distinct subplots that are not interrelated. With the exception of Alan Cumming, the characters are unlikable. I feel sorry for Alan Cumming's character as he is truly a victim of the art world, and the only character in the film that evokes sympathy from me. The constant description of what I think is not art with the most flowery description gets on my nerves. The scene where Amanda Seyfried receives a specially prepared artwork from Stellan Skarsgard truly revolted me. Is that really art? Is that what people would describe as honest and brave, exposing the real life etc? "Boogie Woogie" has a great ensemble cast, but unfortunately the plot is too loosely held together and lacks engagement. It looks more like an aimless collage of happenings in the art world.

London's contemporary art world, everyone has a hustle. Art Spindle runs a high-end gallery and he hopes to flip a painting for millions. One of his assistants, Beth, is sleeping with Art's most acquisitive client, Bob Macclestone. Beth wants Bob to set her up in her own gallery, so she helps him go behind Art's back for the painting. Bob's wife, Jean, sets her eye on a young conceptual artist, Jo, who lusts after Art's newest assistant, Paige. Meanwhile, self-absorbed lesbian Filmmaker is chewing her way through friends and lovers looking to make it. If she dumps her agent, Beth may give her a show.....The cast are great, and the film looks amazing, even though it took me ten minutes to realise the film wasn't set in the seventies, but all in all, it's just too busy, and it gets lost up its own backside.The director must think that when you get such a beautiful cast, things like plot, narrative, and character study do not really matter, just throw in a couple of nude scenes and the public will be interested.It seems that this must of been a pet project for him, and I guess he's some kind of 'luvvie' in theatre, but the man cannot direct.It's full of people moaning about money and being good looking and wanting more and more, and then losing it all and shouting, and taking drugs and alcohol.If I want that, I can just go into the city on a Saturday night.Awful and pretentious, but Winstone is fantastic.

Featuring a de-fanged Christopher Lee (in one of his final roles) as a stubborn but dying owner of a Mondrian painting worth up to $30 million, and Mulder-less Gillian Anderson (whose files here are more likely to be triple than single "X"), along with the passing of the roller skates from infamous BOOGIE NIGHTS "roller girl" Heather Graham to on-screen skating newbie Amanda Seyfried, director Duncan Ward's ensemble flick BOOGIE WOOGIE has features bound to intrigue nearly everyone. Modern art credits for movie usage include Jake & Dinos Chapman, Gary Hume, Constantin Brancusi, Banksy, Gavin Turk, Danny Moynihan, Jessica Craig Martin, Faile, Sarah Lucas, Michael Landy, Robert Gordon McHaig III, Sam Taylor-Wood, and Jim Lambie--all curated by Damien Hirst. Worth the price of admission is the verbal deconstruction of a divorcing couple's collection, including pieces by Picasso, Smith, Kelly, Judd, Flavin, Brancusi, Warhol, Beuys, Hockney, Magritte, Struth, Giacometti, Lucas, Katz, Mapplethorpe, Bacon, Emin, Currin, Landy, Hirst, Rusche, Barney, Dogan, and "the Jew in the library," accomplished through inter-cut parallel scenes between the wife and her thrice-divorced confidante, counterpointed by the conversation between the husband and his divorce lawyer. Plus there's nude chicks.

The only reason I rented Boogie Woogie is the DVD box had on it the words "Gillian Anderson" and "Strong Sexual Content". However, the fact that Agent Scully did not get naked is the least disappointing thing about this film. This movie doesn't work as a comedy. It doesn't work as a drama. It doesn't work as a dramedy or a comada or any other genre or style that you could possibly imagine. Perhaps it all makes sense if you're an aficionado of the London art scene where this story is set, but for everyone else it's like looking at a wall of Egyptian hieroglyphics. You know it's supposed to mean something but you have no idea what it is and you quickly get tired of staring at it.Like Love Actually..., this is a tale about a large cast of characters whose lives intersect. Unlike Love Actually, this one is neither funny nor touching nor remotely evocative of any other human emotion. Art Spindle (Danny Huston) is a big time art dealer and gallery owner who's been laughing a fake laugh his entire life and no longer knows how to not do it. Jean and Bob Macelstone (Gillian Anderson and Stellan Skarsgard) are a wealthy, art loving couple who live in a home that looks like the secret hideout of a Batman villain. Beth Freemantle (Heather Graham) is Art's assistant who's also working behind his back to launch her own gallery with Bob's help. Joe (Jack Huston) is a young artist who is banging Beth and quickly becomes the boy toy of Jean.Continuing on, Dewey (Alan Cumming) is a hanger on in the art world who walks Jean and Bob's dogs and ineffectually manages the career of Elaine (Jaime Winstone), an edgy video artist who turns everything she points her camera at into part of her work. There's also Alfred Rhinegold (Christopher Lee), a sick old man who owns a legendary painting that Art lusts after, and Alfred's wife and butler (Joanna Lumley and Simon McBurney), who are pressuring him to sell it. Paige Prideaux (Amanda Seyfried) is a young girl who falls down and has a parasitic twin living inside her. Oh, and the entire cast of the 70s TV show "The White Shadow" also show up and play a charity basketball game. Yeah, I'm kidding about that but sweetness and light! There are far too many people in this lackluster motion picture.I'm not going to go into any more of the plot because, honest to goodness, I don't understand it. I could follow along but I could never figure out what was supposed to be funny and what was intended to be serious and when it was being satirical and when it was trying to be earnest. Watching Boogie Woogie is like listening to a stranger tell you about the funny thing that happened one time at his place of work and you don't know any of the people involved in the story or what's funny about it. There's a point where it is revealed that a character is gay and the reaction to that revelation clearly indicates that it's supposed to be a big deal…but I don't have slight slightest clue why that character being gay would be a big deal and whether I was meant to be surprised, shocked or amused by it.Now there is some nudity here, though none of it involves Gillian Anderson, and there's more than enough talented and capable actors doing their level best with this script. The movie is also reasonably well directed and effectively paced. The only problem with Boogie Woogie is it's incomprehensible.If you spent a summer interning at a London art gallery, you might be able to might sense of this thing. I could have watched it in reverse and it wouldn't have made much difference. Oh, and if you do want to see Gillian Anderson get naked, go rent a film called Closure. She looks good and the movie's not that bad.