No Place To Hide (1993)

Watched this because a friend of mine is a huge Kristofferson fan and had never even heard of this one so I thought i'd give it a shot. Yeah, there's a good reason neither of us had heard of it before, as it is so very not worth watching. Everything about this movie you have seen before, most likely on TV in an episode of some crime show. The only thing even remotely interesting here is unfortunately seeing O.J. Simpson in a wheelchair. He gets one very brief scene where he gets to convey his feelings about being confined to a wheelchair after being a football star, (he literally shrugs off his grief immediately after his dramatic monologue by saying "hey its no big deal") and then he gets to save Drew Barrymore from two guys with guns who are trying to break into the safe house where he's guarding her. (he dispatches one guy with a mallet!) I'm making this sound a lot more entertaining than it is, its really dreary. Its not even so bad its fun, its just dull and plodding. Kristofferson has lost his wife and daughter in a car accident years before the present and he gets a flashback scene where he gets to act out his rage that may be the one effective scene he has in the film. The rest of the time he's just barely holding himself awake enough to get through his scenes. Its not good.

An adult film -- only those who have experienced what it might be like to lose one's family to the carelessness of a drunk driver might find a certain resonance with Kris Kristofferson's superb portrait of an embittered yet vulnerable detective. A version of the "I've got to put my life back together" story, the film comes perilously close to focusing too much on Drew Barrymore's teenage angst -- her rebellion against authority is not simply the typical teenager's, nor merely the result of being spoiled, as Kristofferson's detective finds out when she begins to cling to him out of real need. As a potential victim of the mysterious group that killed her sister, she needs protection; but as the discarded and abandoned orphan she has become, she needs the love and care of the father she never had. A film to be watched for intense and subtle performances by the two leads, and as well, for OJ Simpson's final film role as Kristofferson's physically disabled pal - a nice counterpart to to the emotionally crippled Barrymore-Kristofferson duo.

A good cast cannot save this one from poor direction, poor production values and some of the stupidest background music ever. The story is predictable, the characters seem to be reading their lines, and the action is contrived. Having said all that, how bad can a movie be that features O.J. Simpson in a story about a slasher?

Here we have an example of the sort of movie for which the terms 'run of the mill' and 'formulatic' were invented. I'd believe this was made for TV if not for some nudity at the very beginning, but I can't imagine that it was released in theaters. My guess would be it went straight to video, especially as it was shot at the very beginning of Drew Barrymore's comeback and stars Kris Kristofferson. She is Tinsel, a 14-year-old who the cop played by Kristofferson must protect. Her ballerina sister was murdered, and it looks like she's next. I sort of enjoyed the beginning of the movie, as Tinsel shows some admirable spunk and self-reliance, but it veers quickly into soppy searching-for-family bunk as it is revealed that the cop's wife and daughter were killed in a car accident and the ballerina was Tinsel's last living relative. So of course neither of them has anyone and they bond, culminating in a scene sure to set just about anyone's eyes rolling. There's also some weird, boring, sort-of subplot about the police chief's involvement with some elitist secret society. It's supposed to be a testament to the great humanity of Kristofferson's cop, but the only thing this flick is a testament to is how far Drew Barrymore had fallen, and how far she has come.