The Steam Experiment (2009)

This is an ineptly made "film" with a nonsensical plot and thinly sketched characters. Val Kilmer plays a deranged scientist who seems to think that the effects of global warming are imminent, and so locks six people in a steam room to prove his point while he also uses them as a bargaining chip to get his "story" published. If that all sounds wacko, it's because it is. Nothing about this makes sense. Val Kilmer is basically portraying a stereotypical conspiracy nut job, but he doesn't even do it that well. And that filmmakers decided to drag global warming into this is even more stupid because it denigrates a serious scientific effort by putting it in the same category with people who believe(d) the world would end in 2012 (and schizophrenic madmen). Aside from him, none of the characters are really given any back story, or any reason to care about them. Armand Assante (as an off-duty cop) does a serviceable job with the material given him and kind of acts as the surrogate for the audience, in a way. He calls out Val Kilmer's character for what he is, and says what everybody in the audience must be thinking about him. Still, it looked like he was sleepwalking through the entire thing. Eric Roberts was the only other actor in this piece of trash that I recognized, but he's given even less to do as one of the six people trapped in a steam room (or are they?). Here is where the writing really lacked. There was no character development to give the audience any reason to care about them, aside from a couple sentences from each stating who they were, where they were from and what they liked/disliked. That's it. After that, it was just them hanging around and slowly going crazy after they find out they can't get out. I just have to say that the film-making here was rather shoddy. The editing was really weird, especially in the steam room scenes. You would have one character speaking, but then it would fade to another while that character was still talking, and replay bits of dialogue. Also, the steam room scenes occur in between scenes of Val Kilmer and Armand Assante and are shown in such a way that it appears that Val Kilmer is either telepathic/omnipotent or he's describing something that already happened, which would directly contradict what he said in the beginning of the movie. Considering that his character is crazy, I guess I could just let it slide but honestly, it's just poor writing, through and through. Val Kilmer's character is basically a Jigsaw wannabe, but only in his head. Even with the mental state of the lead character in question, the appearance of two people (coincidentally, the last two survivors from the steam room) still makes no sense in the context of the story and raises more questions than it answers. Overall, this is a frustratingly bad movie with poor filmic qualities, horrible acting and a story that's too thin and makes no sense. I look forward to never seeing this again.

What the hell is going on with Val Kilmer? Is he always going to play Jim Morrison. I heard the guy is a total egomaniac. I really want to like him but for some reason he keeps landing all of these really weird crappy roles. I can only assume that soon he will go the way of John Travolta and once again become cool. For now this movie was a total bag of dirty socks. The only good part was Eric Roberts. Until he does not bag the hot chick. Than it was all downhill from there. I don't know about you but a scene with Three guys and three hot chicks locked in a steam room that does not have sex in it is just a recipe for disaster. I often wonder who the hell pays money to shoot there's films. I really have a few good movie ideas I just need a list of fools to sell it to. Perhaps the people who did this pile of crap will help me out. Perhaps I am too harsh? O.K. I'll be nice. Val get back in shape and be cool again! I gave is a 3 because there were 3 hot chicks. I would have done 4 but Eric Roberts did not score.

Another clanger from Val Kilmer. I watch many movies and this was one of the most disjointed I've seen for a long time. Kilmer plays some kind of nut-case, but it's never really clear what he wants (even the maddest of people could be more lucid), Armand Assante mumbled his way through the movie so even if he had something interesting to say, you couldn't understand it and the scenes in the steam room were muddled and not at all suspenseful. Kilmer stared bleakly, twitched and fidgeted to show how mad he was, but it came across as just a parody. It was such a mess that at the end of the movie you couldn't figure out who was the real psycho and who was the victim. At what little climax there was, you were left feeling let down and unmoved. Definitely not worth watching unless you are desperate.

I agree with almost all the reviews. The movie, which did keep my interest and was worth a watch, wasn't the best I've ever seen. However, nobody seems to get the ending. The doctor at the hospital (and his wife) were the two people that survived the steam room. They survived because they were plants and working with Val Kilmer. They were in the steam room as part of the experiment to see (and be) the human chaos up front. So the third to last surviver was correct (and not delusional) when he suspected them. Apparently, this doctor became interested in Val Kilmer's experiment and chose to help him carry it out. However, the doctor's motives were not to stop global warming but to better understand by being a part of the human social breakdown (either that or he and his wife were just out for some sick thrills).