The Dark Matter of Love (2012)

The relatively peaceful (documented) outcome was truly against all odds, as many here have said. I enjoyed watching this, despite being slightly sickened and saddened by the emotional issues and blatant ignorance of the parents. As many have said, the experts' diagnosis of Masha was ridiculous, as she was almost unimaginably calm and collected considering the transition. (ugh that alliteration reminded me of the disgusting renaming of the kids to "C" names... a pathetic attempt to play "perfect family"). Sorry, I don't mean to bash the parents who were doing their best, as is everyone. Remember that. But to not learn any Russian? Jesus. The ethnocentrism of some American families is so sad. In itself, I don't know if the language isolation was that damaging, but it clearly revealed the ignorance and unpreparedness of the parents, and ultimately shows their lack of empathy and understanding of the THREE kids they adopted. The two boys could have been much more demonic, and I found the scene where they were cussing out the father hilarious. I would have laughed out loud if I wasn't also a little sickened by the father's disciplinary ignorance. Again, sorry for my bashing. To conclude: Masha was wonderful and would (will?) grow into a very intelligent adult with better caretaker modeling, hopefully some wise and loving adult appears in her life, the sooner the better. The boys have an impressive sense of self, and that will serve them well. Yes, the home environment is better than a Russian orphanage, but still much more superficial than most homes I've been in. To viewers in Russia: many Americans are much more aware and real then this family. To prospective American adoptive parents: not all Russian children coming from orphanages are going to be that easy. Best of luck to the family, and I hope they can help each other heal and grow, as all families have the opportunity to do together. Maybe this situation is what all involved need, and I am just acting ignorant by typing this snarky post.

As a mother of 8 children, it is clear to me that the issues encountered by adoption are not far from what parents go through normally. Each child is born with a unique personality and temperament that requires flexible nerves and a steadfast love for each one. The abnormal part the film shows a sudden introduction of three older children that turns the house into an exhausting battle, physically and mentally. Adjustment for this family and many like it require professional councilors and years to blend as a family unit. Not impossible.The editing on the film was good but could have been better - it was not clear the reasons for adopting. *Overall - it is enjoyable to watch, interesting and informative.

Two naive but well-intentioned parents (with biological teenage daughter Cami) take on the adoption of three Russian youngsters simultaneously. Where was the social worker to advise against this? The children know no English, and the parents don't bother to learn Russian. The resulting disciplinary confusion is uncomfortable, and almost laughable. The children demonstrate two manifestations of Attachment Disorder: extreme detachment in the case of eleven-year-old Masha, and uncontrolled temper tantrums in the cases of five-year-old twins Marcel and Vadim. To make matters worse, the children's names are changed, without their input, to Americanized names like "Caitlin" and "Cody," rather than celebrating their Russian heritage.And yet the narrative redeems itself. Firstly, the attachment disorders are explained, and the family is counseled by professionals. There is a scientific anthropological thread throughout the movie. And perhaps more to the point: love conquers all in this case. In spite of the awkwardness, they all eventually find love and acceptance in their augmented family.

I thought this documentary was very moving, thought provoking and beautiful. It follows three children from Russia and their new adopted family from the US through connecting and finding their place together as a family. It portrayed in a very realistic way peoples need to connect, to feel a sense of belonging and stability. It also showed the consequences of how you are brought up yourself and past experiences will shape you as a parent. It was very interesting to learn how huge a role affection, love and connecting with other people have in a child's development.I found it moving and utterly fantastic. The movie showed how we all need relationships of love, support and safety in our lives. The basic necessities are not just food, water, air, shelter and sleep, we also need each other. I recommend this documentary t everyone.