H. (2014)

This title keeps getting pushed further and further up the list of Sci-Fi/Fantasy films so eventually, having drained much of the selection, I went for this one. The overly pretentious introductory credit sequence should have clued me in but I am not averse to "art"-y films that tend to linger and rely on soft music cues and sometimes inexplicable imagery to get a message across, usually so long as there is an actual message, even if the message is one of entertainment. Despite my patience for such styles of film, what leaves me decidedly impatient is a film that meanders about, either taking entirely too long to actually begin its storytelling in the mistaken belief that its initial setting and/or its characterizations are strong enough to hold up for nearly 1/3rd of the film's runtime without actually going anywhere (and in this case, it entirely is not), or simply being insufferable. The characters we are introduced to in this film are insufferable. The elderly couple begins its time onscreen as being almost cute. But the longer the film drags on, leaving us with little actual subject matter and leaving us wondering what the film's name even is, the more this couple becomes insufferable. They banter about in the sort of empty-headed, inane manner that is the punchline of stereotypical Midwestern moron type characters. What is further infuriating is that the elderly woman dotes over a disgustingly realistic infant doll, treating it like a real baby, even in public. It's horrifying to look at, and one character, a cashier, glares at it in horror and then nothing further is made of it. After a grueling 20 minutes or so, we finally move on to the next couple, a younger one that is described as being "artistic", engaging in photography that tends to be extremely violent, with the two of them apparently often violently attacking each other for their art. I say they are "described" as such because this plays absolutely no role in their story going onward. This woman is pregnant, and by this point in the film, happily, we've gone through enough empty film that we can start up the actual plot with this couple. In short, stuff is happening. That's about as vague as it gets because that's about as vague as the film wants it to get. It's not Nothing happening, it's clearly something. Some manner of explosion occurred over this small town, which news reports claim to be a meteor, and now some people are going missing, some people are walking around in fugue states, some people are suffering burst blood vessels in their eyes, and black horses randomly appear in places. We get about half way through the film before these events start to unfold, culminating in the ultimate sense of "what the fuddery" as the younger Helen goes to the doctor and... she's not pregnant. She didn't have a miscarriage, she didn't lose the baby, it's just... gone. Unfortunately, so much time has passed in the film thus far that I as a viewer have completely and utterly disconnected from the characters and the plot. I no longer care for them in any way and have no thoughts on the film other than wondering how soon it will end. There is nothing to this film in terms of writing, acting, cinematography, or sound design that can hold one's attention long enough to sustain sitting through this incoherent dribble waiting for actual story to unfold. Everything is "average", "acceptable", "ably performed and executed". It's immensely disappointing that as the film unfolds, more and more insanity and inexplicable phenomena unfold, and yet by the time this all has happened, the film has blown its proverbial load on essentially nothing. A pack of boring, two-dimensional characters, lots of quiet, unremarkable music, and a broad sense of moodiness over nothing in particular. We are essentially watching a science fiction horror movie unfolding in the background. We are watching a group of ordinary, average people living their lives while a history-making paranormal event is unfolding just off-screen via brief news snippets and occasional background interactions.Maybe that stuff is lush fodder for "artsy" movies like this, but it was just plain boring and a dismal waste of so much time.

This movie, while strangely compelling and relatively well acted (which is why I did not give it zero stars), was H.orrible. It was as if some High-Schoolers decided to make a movie with strange images and no plot. This movie is reminiscent of those very strange, low budget, eastern European art films. This movie has an incredibly dismal and depressing feel to it. If that is the only intention, they succeeded. A dismal feel should be done purposefully. There is no connection between the story and the feel of the movie. Random images strewn haphazardly about without even the meagerest of explanation or connection adds to the pointlessness of this film. *spoiler alert, maybe*. Was the high pitched noise a meteor? How does this cause water on the floor? Why was the field of lost souls near Lake George? Horse? And then a horse/man creature? Floating rock/head? Why does an old woman commit to a life-like baby doll? And, continues to pretend the doll is real even after her husband goes missing? Then wash-kills it? A young woman that is pregnant, then not, then is, then isn't? Post-apocalyptic? Pre-apocalyptic? If you like those Czech or Yugoslav art films, you MAY like this. I, for one, am glad I did not spend money to see this one.

The film is apt to be somewhat fun to watch for anyone familiar with Troy, Rensselaer County, New York, though likely far slower and artier than the average viewer is apt to enjoy. There are lots of local businesses that appear, and roads that are recognizable like Hoosick Road, Oakwood Avenue and probably Farrell Road. The geography is a little confusing when it comes to the Lake George references. Lake George is more than a little than "just outside of Troy" as it's described - it's about an hour's drive north and two counties away.The Helen statue's head that's seen floating along - that's not in Lake George as some viewers interpret it, but in the Hudson River that runs along the west side of the City of Troy.The story? You're best off turning to interviews of the directors online. Childhood readings of Greek mythology, not revisited, contributed as well as some real-life things abut which they'd read, further influenced by the eventual choice of Troy as the primary shooting location.

There is nothing better than when a movie frightens you, or disturbs you without having to throw special effects at you from around a dark corner. I almost didn't watch this. I am glad I did. This is not a horror film. But it has that perfect blend of an off putting mood, and an unsettling atmosphere. If you like scary movies because of the vibe of the movie and not the special effects, this is a diamond in the ruff. These kind of movies are so rare, unfortunately. It is an apocalyptic movie, without the actual apocalypse. At times you feel like there are religious under tones. They leave a lot of the elements of the what feels to be inevitable unfolding of the end of world to your imagination, but give you enough to know that something unearthly is happening.