I Want Candy (2008)

The writers of this blatant copycat film should hang their heads in shame - for 'I want Candy' is an exact duplicate of 'The Girl Next Door' released 3 years prior. What? You thought we wouldn't notice - that we'd forget in 3 years. Everything, from the characters to the situations and story, is more or less an exact copy of a much better film.Films like 'I want Candy' make me physically feel sick to the stomach - I want us Brits to make films that inspire the rest of world cinema, not 'knock it off'. I cannot imagine anyone with the right frame of mind liking this movie after they have seen 'The Girl Next Door', a much better directed and far better written film.If you haven't seen this film - DO NOT WATCH IT. If you have seen this film, enjoyed it, and not yet seen 'The Girl Next Door', I advise you to watch it as it is a much better film if somewhat underrated.

As comedy movies go, I want Candy just isn't funny. It makes you smile a couple of times but thats it, we are not talking American Pie territory here.The movie itself is about 15 minutes too long and stutters to an dull and boring end, i.e the award ceremonies which was to predictable and unnecessary.Cast wise OK, except for the cameo of Alan Carr and his stupid hat trying to be Quentin Tarantino ?, did he really need a speaking part, he's much better at being funny than acting funny.In summary worth a look after the pub, but its never going to be a classic, Brit comedy.

The pretentiousness of the acting in a throwback 70's England, the accents, it is too apparent that they are there to "normalise" a lack of freedom. The English accents are phoney, and I am referring to the leads, and they're English! There aren't and never were stereotypical "gangster like cultures" in England; seeing the mock up in belittling youngsters with "you're surrounded with evil in some industries; keep quiet and under the influence of the monopoly that is running the movie industry in England" will only result in every truly refreshing pro establishment youngster that can conceive reality appropriately being fooled into submitting to the paradigm that following Ealing Studio mighty formulas will help weaving reality with social engineering, resulting only in social engineering prevailing, of the type they want to enforce in England even. All the emphases, all the mannerism, have been conceived by writers that know how to project in writing a "switch", a literal switch to turn on and off vomiting; youngsters in England will get a headache and a sensation of vomit from every cinematographic effort intended to induce vomit within this movie, and there's plenty of them. Young English people in this movie, those supposed to be students getting out of an art college, are directed to assume 70 year old people demeanour, but of 70 year olds that were living in the 30s! That odd vomiting sensation again, and again. There's an odd effort to project a conformity, to propagate how people in their place remain in their place; can you believe "writers that make it in England" are only producing this garbage? We've given them computers, affordable word processors; they can cut, paste, rearranged and modify at will, a luxury filmmakers of the 20's didn't have, but this is all they can come up with? It stinks, and you know it's done on purpose. Parents in the 21st century imitating Carry On characters?! What gave the writers the idea that is a paradigm that is well perceived or marketable? It is neither in fact! The Carry On franchise had parodies for the time the were made; in a 21st century context their parody doesn't apply; pass me a strong paper bag. Youngsters in England aren't that insecure; that interpreting a wayward son of a parent with a "blooming" business means approximating the worst possible middle class hero available in England is just wanting not to have more people filling up the cinemas.England has been placed in trance, with a fascination with celebrities that approximate the lowest common denominator. The humour is silly; a mid 20's character in England isn't making shallow jokes like a chap in his early puberty years. For the producers of this movie, the purpose is to propagate mediocrity in English made movies; before is too late that is, before some movement in England finally wake everyone up and make aware that the establishment, 99.99% of the population that is, shouldn't put up with the self elected leaders which only represent 0.01% of the population, these latter being the anarchists, the anti-establishment. Absolutely everything has been put together with care avoiding any hint of reality; there's a storyline throughout this movie that has been conceived while in a cotton cloud; I feel like vomiting. I suppose this movie might have been made more watchable if everyone in it was going around without arms; that way they would have had much less chances in between takes to hide their eyes and face in shame, especially some of the lead actors; acting is acting, not an imitation of one's regurgitating character. Often the same joke is repeated over and over, a classic "repeat a lie times enough until it becomes true"'; but it doesn't work with bad jokes to start with, not matter the reiterations. Characters in this movie imitate other characters already present on UK TV channels; there is this tangible effort in the "UK movie industry", masqueraded in laziness, to avoid portraying new and really outstanding and entertaining characters, probably because they might be trouble with the severely weak self-righteousness of the monopoly capitalism running amok in England.This film is in a new genre; definitely not comedy; it's in between drama and horror, but also with a little action, like vomiting action and getting out of the theatre action. Whoever watched the end result with a minimum of brain must have gotten an headache, it is such a sleeper; but wasn't it blatant by reading the script in the first place? England is better than what the junkies directing and writing this junk have had the omen to distribute as a movie. Let me through, I need to vomit; remembering one the scenes has triggered the switch again. 0/5 Even funds from the UK National Lottery have been wasted on this movie -1/5 then! [email protected]

For every great film there must, somewhere, also be a turkey. For every Citizen Kane, we also get Little Man. And so it seems is the case for British comedies. Shortly after the fabulous Hot Fuzz, surely the best British comedy since Life of Brian, we get the dreary, predictable and not very funny I Want Candy. The film follows two film students who, desperately trying to make their first great movie, decide to make a porn film with the help of some fellow students. They manage to persuade an American female porn star, who just happens to be visiting the UK at the time, to take the lead in their film, which in turn helps them persuade a dodgy porn producer to finance their project. And that's about as deep as the film goes. Tom Riley and Tom Burke play the two students and are supported by Carmen Electra as the porn queen and Michelle Ryan as the film's production manager (romantic sub-plot). All of them give OK performances despite a script full of bad innuendos, boring sight gags, and wafer thin plot. The film is not supposed to be a cinematic work of art, clearly, but bad writing that has more than a hint of influence from those god awful 'Confessions of...' films of the 1970's makes this a cinematic experience to forget.