Creepshow (1982)

I tried to find a good Stephen King film. To this day, I watched a dozen of 'em, found none.This film was comical. It has a comic in it, doesn't it? None of the stories felt creepy.Was it made for kids or something? Mister King writes a lot, but sorry to say, they are mostly vegetable. I mean, Where was the creep? It isn't possible that all the directors who made films out of Stephen King stories are bad at makin' it, is it? I am still to find a jump scare in a Stephen King film. I tried, I did not.

Creepshow (8/10) A horror anthology brought together by two of the most renowned minds in horror, Stephen King and George A. Romero. The first of five stories is the super cheesy "Father's Day", a great way to kick off the series of spook stories. Next was Something To Tide You Over, which in my opinion has the best writing and dialogue of the bunch. We also see E.G. Marshall and Stephen King star as the lone character in their respective stories, which is about a fast invasive space plant species' and an apartment being overrun by cockroaches that symbolize the cities minority community. The most notable segment is the fan favorite called The Crate led by Hal Holbrook, the lovely Adrienne Barbeau and a wicked, little man-eating arctic monster. The movie as a whole keeps the viewer interested since the stories are so short and the dark comedy is persistently good. If I were to rank the stories it would go Something To Tide You Over, The Crate, Father's Day, The Lonesome Death of Jody Verrill, They're Creeping Up On You.

Billy is punished for reading comic horror Creepshow. The Creep invites him to five tales. In Father's Day, the old patriarch Nathan Grantham was killed by his daughter Bedelia. During a family gathering, Nathan is resurrected and takes revenge while getting the cake. In 'The Lonesome Death of Jordy Verrill', Jordy Verrill (Stephen King) is a dimwit farmer who finds a meteorite and is soon overcome with extraterrestrial plant life. In 'Something to Tide You Over', wealthy Richard Vickers (Leslie Nielsen) takes revenge on his wife and her lover Harry Wentworth (Ted Danson) by burying them up to their necks in the beach. In 'The Crate', college professor Henry Northup (Hal Holbrook) is informed of a deadly creature inside of a crate and he sees an easy way to get rid of his hateful wife Wilma (Adrienne Barbeau). In 'They're Creeping Up on You', ruthless business Upson Pratt (E. G. Marshall) has sealed himself up in his high tech apartment due to his germophobia. There is a blackout and his apartment is overrun by cockroaches.The first two tales are forgettable. The third one burying alive Ted Danson is not. It is the most compelling tale in the whole movie. It works on every level from the acting to the writing. The fourth one has a couple of interesting actors and the last one is creepy as hell. I'm not that afraid of bugs but people who do would really get unhinged over that one. The wrap-around story with Billy could probably be better. I'm sure they could have found a better actor than Stephen King's son. Teaming up horror icons like George A. Romero and Stephen King doesn't guarantee anything but this one worked out great.

'The Creepshow' is a 50's retro-styled horror comic book come to life. Think "Tales From the Crypt", and you've got the idea. It's a very well packaged, fun collection of stories with a great cast.The movie opens with a scene of a little boy being punished for reading a Creepshow comic book, which probably wasn't all that uncommon back in the '50s. As the kid pouts up in his room, a ghastly figure appears at the window beckoning the child to join him, and thus becoming our host for the evening's entertainment.The naysayers will say it comes across as campy and corny, or that it's not scary, etc....Look, Stephen King and George Romero wanted it to be silly and corny, that's what comic book's were/are. In this regard, they nailed it. In classic comic book fashion, a lot of scenes are framed in retro comic book style graphics, with even the occasional caption thrown in for good measure, as they cut away from a scene. And the acting is superb throughout, as professionals like Ed Harris, Leslie Nielsen, Ted Danson, E.G. Marshall, Hal Holbrook, Adrienne Barbeau, Fritz Weaver and even Steven King all make appearances. I always laugh when I see the young Ed Harris in the first story, already sporting a receding hair line as a young man.While I agree that this movie isn't really that scary, I found the fourth story, 'The Crate', to have it's fair share of suspense and is easily the scariest story of the bunch. The third story, 'Something to Tide You Over', which features Nielsen and Danson, I found to be particularly creepy as Nielsen lures two lovers, one which happens to be his wife, to a secluded beach which he ironically calls 'Comfort Point' and buries them up to their necks in the sand. Waiting for the tide to come in. And that's not even the worst part. He sets up cameras and monitors in front of each lover so they can watch each other drown. Of course, he's also able to watch the action from the 'comfort' of his beach house, where he doesn't lack for enthusiasm.One last thing. For short stories, there is genuinely really good character development which lends itself to some pretty funny scenes and lines, albeit some can be somewhat subtle. Watching Ed Harris dance always makes me laugh. And Leslie Nielsen is, well, Leslie Nielsen, and really portrays his demented character to perfection. And some of the scenes when Hal Holbrook fantasizes about killing his wife, Adrienne Barbeau, are just flat out hilarious. As is she as she constantly belittles him in front of everybody.I've given this movie an 8 because it's entertaining and fun. It's not the scariest movie. It was never meant to be. Yes, it's kinda of campy and corny. Which is exactly what it's supposed to be. If you can just enjoy 'The Creepshow' for what it is and not what it isn't, most likely you'll like it.