Fire Birds (1990)

Jake Preston (Nicolas Cage) is flying his Cobra attack helicopter against the drug cartel in South America. His group of Cobras and Blackhawks are attacked by a mercenary flying a Scorpion. The military decides to send more into the fight. Jake goes to Fort Mitchell to train in the Apache helicopter under Brad Little (Tommy Lee Jones). Brad wants to fly missions but he's deemed too valuable as a trainer. Billie Lee Guthrie (Sean Young) is Jake's ex training to fly reconnaissance. Jake is a confidential natural pilot but he struggles in the dark with left eye dominance.This is trying to be Top Guns with helicopters. I like that part of the movie. Sean Young assembling a shoulder fired anti-aircraft missile is kind of cool. The aerial combat is slightly below the level of Top Guns. Tommy Lee is a great old guy. Sean Young is good but her relationship with Nicolas Cage is too overwrought. Cage is doing a simple one-note performance as the cocky flier. He is overdoing it Nicolas Cage style. I like seeing the helicopters but not so much the characters.

'Wings of the Apache' is a truly awful film. I can find little good to say about it. During the first five minutes I was 'on the edge of my seat' only in a bad, jaw-droppingly amazed kind of way. I've watched many bad films over the year. I normally turn them off. However, I sat all the way through this one's one hour and seventeen minute runtime. I really couldn't avert my eyes.Most people describe 'Wings of the Apache' as 'Top Gun with helicopters.' Yeah, I think that's a reasonable description, only Top Gun was watchable for different reasons. The opening five minutes I spoke about is basically Nicholas Cage narrating over a bland action scene involving a helicopter dogfight over some mountains. Now, I'm no expert, but I seem to remember the first rule of storytelling is 'show, don't tell.' Yet Cage just tells us what's happening in a monotone voice. Apparently, the drugs cartels are now using helicopters to shoot down American helicopters. Does this actually happen in real life? Never mind, it does here. And Nicholas Cage – being the only guy who's seen the cartel's helicopter in action – must lead the charge against the lone chopper.He's ably aided by Tommy Lee Jones – a great actor in his own right, now reduced to barking orders in the most stereotypical 'drill instructor' way possible. Plus there's a love interest. Guess where that subplot goes? So Nick, Tommy and the token woman must train to fight the baddie then fight the baddie then save the day. Hardly inspiring, but I think the most unforgivable element of the film is the editing. It's just bad. It's like every shot has been filmed separately to every other one and then spliced together – badly. There's a slight pause between when someone answers the person original speaking, making conversations seem stilted (assuming the dialogue spoken was any good to begin with – and nine times out of ten it isn't).So, in case you haven't got the drift of what I've been saying, 'Wings of the Apache' is just bad. And I watched it all until the last credit rolled. Now I've seen it, I wonder why I did and yet I'm also curious as to why I may – one day – even watch it again, just to remind myself how bad it was. It's bad, but bordering on that so-bad-it's-good kind of way. If you're prepared for that, it will certainly keep your eyes fixed on the screen for exactly one hour and seventeen minutes.

The use of helicopters against jet fighters isn't as far-fetched as another reviewer claimed; an experimental exercise at Operation RED FLAG years ago demonstrated that, counter-intuitively, attack choppers actually do very well against jets as they are far more maneuverable. But there are other reasons why we won't generally see Apaches used against MiGs in air combat. "FIREBIRDS" was a good movie if all you're interested in is aerial photography and action. Some of the dialog was puerile beyond belief, and the "ex lovers" ploy between the two leads was clichéd as all get-out. Purely for aerial adventure: A- All other elements: D-

Fire Birds was released during an unfortunate string of cheesy air combat type of flicks. Top Gun was a one of the first air combat movies, and it will always remain the best. After that, there were some horrible movies like the Iron Eagle sequels and the other movie I can think of(It's not quite as bad) is Flight of the Intruder. Then Fire Birds came along. This proves that movies of this genre are generally not good at all. The action is quite cheesy, and the acting is overdone. I'm not sure how it is that they could mess up the acting so badly. This movie has Nicholas Cage, Tommy Lee Jones, and Sean Young. Not worth your time, ignore the claim that this was supposed to be like Top Gun with helicopters, it doesn't even come close.