Shark Bait (2006)

I find watching paint dry more enjoyable than this film. Due to the requirements of IMDb, I'm forced to spend wasted time on why this film is deserving of the lowest rating allowed on the site. The movie is a poor man's version of "Finding Memo" and also has similarities with "Sharktail." If cruel and unusual punishment was legal, watching "The Reef" on repeat would fit the bill.To be honest, if possible, I would have given it a negative rating. Unfortunately, "The Reef" was given to my toddler as a gift, since he hasn't watched it an infinite amount of times, we have too endure voice overs that seem disinterested and cgi that is sub par even compared to today's apps geared for toddlers. Avoid this film!

Compared to this, films like The Little Mermaid and more recently Finding Nemo are broad, groundbreaking epic pieces of surrealist animated genius that echo Fantasia. Yes, Shark Bait truly is that bad in fact it could well be looked at as a new low for animation as a whole. But it's not that Shark Bait isn't just bad, it's mostly pointless. Did we really need another film about a young and energetic hero who must overcome his self doubts and doubters as he strives to win the heart of a young female and beat the bad guys in the process, creating a better and safer new order? No, we didn't but Shark Bait goes ahead anyway.I read that this film was a joint venture between the U.S.A. and South Korea; ugh, what do these two nations have in common when it comes to film-making? Shark Bait's cast includes R. Lee Ermey; John Rhys-Davies; Donal Logue; Rob Schneider and Freddie Prinze Jr. Love or hate any of the cast, that's still an impressive array of different personalities but judging by the animation, did they blow all the money on the cast? There used to be a time when it didn't matter who was doing the voiceovers and the goal was to create a dynamic and visually impressive experience, not any more it would seem; now we have to have names to fill up the posters and get people in – but get them into what? A word on the animation. On this occasion, the film looks more like a badly rendered PC screensaver produced by a second rate company for an equally second rate computer, and that's at the best of times. There is one occasion when the animation threatens to pull through and that's when the hero and his girl are above the sea level watching the moon – the ripples in the water and clouds above seem impressive enough, but that's when you realise the two fish have been above the water for so long, they would've 'drowned' by now.Also, a point on the joint U.S.A./South Korea set-up is that they're two very different nations when it comes to animation or cartoons. When I think of Korea, I guess I think of 'funimation', or 'cute' animation, something that has perhaps spilled over from Japanese contemporary culture. Now, it's all well and good saying this is a kids film and so forth and that it fits but there is a clash of ideas here. The Americans have made some cracking animated films in the last few years such as Monster's Inc.; Ice Age and Finding Nemo but these were American through and through and there is no 'influence' or clashing from other nation's animated ideas.The Shark Bait of the title is Pi (Prinze Jr.), a young fish whose family is swept away by a human fishing net and flees to a fish sanctuary far away to live with a relative. It's here he meets girlfriend Cordelia (Evans-Wood) and shark bully Troy (Logue), who wants Cordelia for himself – can you imagine what the kids between a shark and an angelfish (or whatever Cordelia is) would look like? Anyway, Pi must come to learn that just taking something is the wrong belief and sharing what Troy thinks is additionally incorrect so he must go through a training montage with an elder mentor and on and on it goes. Now, delivering this sort of message to very young kids is fine, I suppose, but when a film is so inept that it sounds like the voice talent was recorded in someone's living room and the script sees needs-must to throw in homosexual German crabs and a photographer of French decent as well as Jamaican and Southern United State accents for the hell of it, it grates on me.Additionally at Shark Bait's centre is the idea that Cordelia, the female the two males are fighting over, is nothing but a mere prize to be won and that's the catalyst for the whole film to even happen - that part certainly isn't a positive message. The film is all feint, feint set up and no payoff. Did I mention Cordelia is supposed to be some sort of fish celebrity that appears on the cover of National Geographic? I guess the fish know that because one of them must've seen a discarded issue, amid all the other trash, on the bed of where Pi was living at the very beginning. But, this celebrity status is non-existent from the beginning and she manages to go to a concert with Pi without anyone noticing her – that's before the trip above water where they should've died.The film wonders on and Pi eventually undertakes a training routine from a turtle that knows some sort of martial art in which controlling water bursts and moving at high speed are key; Pi only cracks it when he actually builds up enough energy to get genuinely angry. Everything from Troy's nasty sidekicks, one of whom seems to posses an accent reminiscent of a 1930s Hollywood gangster whilst the other seems to be doing a really bad Christopher Walken impression, to Troy's own frequent rhyming as he attempts to get across a sense of evil; it all fails and fails big time.

Functioning only as an apt definition for "hot mess," "The Reef" is really just an awful movie. The script, the voice acting, and the animation are not even a notch above film school amateur hour. In fact, a conscientious mouse jockey in his mom's basement could probably compose a 5-minute CGI short on his Mac with more going for it."The plot" does not matter as the similarities between it, "Finding Nemo," and "Shark Tale" are so obvious that Helen Keller could find them. The glaring deficiencies in the quality of CGI, screenplay, voice acting and the feeble rip-off of other far more capable screen stories makes one wonder why someone at some point didn't come to their senses and ditch this project long before it ever made it in the can.It tries for some jokes but fails every time. In fact, I don't think I laughed once. Even purposefully bad groaners fail to elicit a chuckle. The puns are so deliberate and juvenile it's baffling that it could have passed muster to any adult sensibility. But, then again, even "Howard the Duck" got made.One of the key reasons there are no laughs is that there is no good voice acting. There is zero personality attached to these characters. Everyone involved is phoning in it and probably going for a paycheck to cover their Christmas fund.Movies like this make you appreciate the thoughtful craftsmanship of Pixar's movies. It makes you realize how vital the story and the composition of the script is - not to mention, of course, their vastly superior CGI animation. Even relatively "bad" CGI movies like Shark Tale and Madagascar have tons more personality and skill behind them than "The Reef" does. As desperately tired as I am of all these awful and cheaply made CGI movies about animals, insects, or both, at least most of them have some basic charm and a few jokes you may actually laugh at, thus in some measure vaguely redeeming themselves."The Reef," however, has no redeeming value at all. Best to leave this one alone as watching it will merely be torture.

I saw The Reef (which is one of Shark Bait's other titles, to which I shall refer it as) when I was in Ireland, and I kinda liked it. It's definitely not Finding Nemo, and I haven't seen Shark Tale (so I can't compare the two); it's in a class all by itself.Now, many people have said that The Reef is a rip-off of Finding Nemo, Shark Tale, or both movies. But The Reef is more like, and here I quote another user whose name I forget, "Karate Kid with fish".A quick summary of the plot: When Pi suddenly becomes an orphan, he travels with a pod of porpoises (NOT dolphins! As Percy laments, "Why does everyone think I'm a dolphin?") to the reef in order to live with his aunt. Pi meets up with his cousin, Dylan, and a beautiful model named Cordelia. Pi is immediately smitten with Cordelia, but a big problem stands in his way. Troy the tiger shark wants to give Cordelia his pearl (the equivalent of a wedding ring, and a bit of a symbol of giving one's purity to his/her spouse...but that's a different story). But Pi can't stand to see Cordelia pushed around by that big bully and his two cronies, a barracuda and a wolf eel, so he decides to do something about it...but what? With the help of Dylan, Percy and his pod, Nerissa the ninja/wizard sea turtle, three old marlins, a seal with grand storytelling skills, a sassy crab, and a flippant saw shark, Pi sets off to save the reef...and the girl he loves. But -- cue dramatic music -- will he succeed? I still remember a few quotes, like "The captain is ashamed of you...and he doesn't even exist!" (Nerissus), and "Evil henchmen don't get the willies. They *give* the willies!" (the barracuda). Plus, the three old marlins swapping human stories (Remember that last fish you caught? How sure are you that it wasn't trying to catch you?) and a few undersea puns ("Check out my mussels" and "Un-fishin-believeable!") will catch the fish nerd in you.Of course, the CGI is a bit strange. Some people call it cheap effort, but I say it's merely artistic license. Then again, I'm overly optimistic...Now, this movie is without flaws, even in my view. Occult/supernatural stuff, lots of unnecessary bathroom gags, and a stereotypical gay attitude to the saw shark gave me the blahs. That's why this movie got a seven out of ten from me.In the end, it all depends on your tastes. If you like fish movies, and you have strange tastes, then go on ahead and see it...although you may want to wait for the DVD and just rent that...it's really up to you.And, if you *really* like fish movies (like I do), then why not watch FiN, ST, and TF as a triple-feature?