Holding the Man (2016)

This thoughtful adaptation of Tim Conigrave's autobiography parallels events in my own life here in the U.S, though I am 10 years older than the characters portrayed. As a hospice nurse during the AIDS epidemic, as a person living with AIDS, as the life partner of a man living with AIDS still, I found this memoir perhaps a most personal and least embellished representation of gay male relationships before and during the HIV epidemic's height.From a critical viewpoint, I admire the actors of great international stature who put in roles which enhanced the story without intruding upon it. Well done. I felt their sincere support of the project from their performances. I don't know that American actors would have been able to do so.I applaud the portrayal of the devastation of disease on loving relationships and affection between long-time partners. The portrayal of anticipation of separation by death, in contrast to the earlier youthful separation over sexual desires was very poignant. The sensitivity of the film cuts through the stereotypes of male Australian culture beautifully without being sappy.As a person who has survived HIV for 32 years with many ups and downs, I usually avoid films about the AIDS epidemic like the plague itself. When my partner recommended it to me, I flinched. However, I would have missed a rare emotional experience if I had let it pass me by. Thank you, Tim Conigrave and all who have brought his work to us.

I am a bit of a hard ash when it comes to rating and reviewing movies, and this movie hit all of the marks for me. It was sublime, and had me literally sobbing toward the end.Being from America, I was not familiar with the book or the story, and in fact, only got the movie because of the cover art. I wasn't really looking for a movie that dealt with the early days of HIV/AIDS, and in fact, tend to steer clear of them because they are usually done so poorly, but HTM deals with it not only realistically, but with great humanity. In the end, the movie isn't about the disease, but the love these two men shared.And what a love it must have been. Most of us could only ever hope for a love like that, and never actually find it. In that regard, it reminds me of Bridegroom. Both of those films leave you with the hope that fairy tale love really can exist in the real world.

Ryan Corr (Tim Conigrave) and Ryan Stott (John Caleo) give truly magnificent performances in this film, never understating or overstating their characters. Having worked in the HIV/AIDS sector in Victorian and Queensland from the early 90s through to 2008 I was somewhat skeptical about this movie and its ability to depict a horrible period in the HIV epidemic while remaining true to the love story between Tim and John. Once I saw the movie my skepticism was unfounded.The book "Holding the Man" is not a great work, however it does provide an insight into the discrimination that gay men experienced because of their sexuality and the horror of the emergence of the HIV/AIDS virus in the gay community. The movie is similar and faithful to the narrative. When I started working in HIV/AIDS prevention in the early 90s I met Tim Conigrave a few times. My sense of him was that he was brash, political and took no prisoners. Ryan Corr achieves all of this and more. And the movie leaves nothing to the imagination from the adventurous sex in saunas through to the illnesses of AIDs and John's prolonged and ugly death due to the virus. I'd forgotten how dreadful the impact of HIV/AIDS was on those during that time. The film brought it all flooding back from the countless pills to be taken, the salvage treatment and surgery to the tragedy of those gay men who died. Performances by the supporting cast such as Anthony La Paglia, Kerry Fox, Guy Pearce and Camillah Ah Kin as the parents of Tim and John are convincing and at times moving. The performances of the rest of the co-students and friends are delightful. Catch it before it finishes screening, you won't be disappointed.

I'll say from the outset as a gay male I wanted this to be great and elements of it were, so I'm not coming from a perspective of critical indifference. I read the book when it came out and so knew what I was in for, all in all I must say the film was pretty faithful to it and didn't shy away from its most confronting or gruelling contents. I wondered beforehand whether it would or not and was impressed that it dealt with all the heaviest stuff head on, and did so well. The movie also gave me insights that my imagining as I read the book didn't, which I found illuminating and very interesting. I am from Melbourne, Australia where most of this story happened, so am familiar with its locales and some of them are of personal significance to me, so there is some overlap. There were many very strong elements in this film and as with Woody Allen's 'Irrational Man', it should have been great. The historical, social and cultural details of the mise- en-scene, costume, dialogue and even inflection were incredibly accurate, having lived through them myself, and lovingly, painstakingly recreated. Strong performances abounded, with standouts being Craig Stott who gave an incredible performance as John Caleo on par with Meryl Streep only less gimmicky, and that of the actress who played his mother, who gave a beautiful, nuanced performance. The film was for the most part very watchable, with warmth, drama and humour. Its filmmaking basics were very strong. Unfortunately, director Neil Armfield and/or producers went for an overlay of somewhat cheesy, narrated-by-crowd- pleasers pop songs that spelt out the emotions episodically and in a too obvious, simplistic way sometimes. Some of these songs and moments worked and were very touching, but evidently they were aiming for the youth market and it didn't work for me. Second of all, the film is of a genre satirised on Shaun Micallef's Mad As Hell as 'Reflecting Your Comfortable Middle Class Life Back To You And Validating It', Micallef's alternate title for such Aussie schlock as 'Packed To The Rafters', from whence came Ryan Corr who played Tim Conigrave, perhaps tellingly. I would have loved that kind of thing in my twenties, not knowing any better, but now it makes me want to reach for a bucket. And it's not cynical, bitter old age, it makes for dramatically inferior melodrama in my opinion. These two in my view major flaws really marred 'Holding The Man' for me and while professional filmmaking abounded and there were many fine elements, sadly these two errors almost dragged it down into prime time soap opera fare at times, 'Home and Away'. The excellent TV series 'Puberty Blues' which covered the 70's in a similar fashion managed to avoid such pitfalls, was a serious drama and a lot of fun, and managed to achieve art in my opinion. I have a reverent amount of respect for the blood, sweat and tears that go into a movie production, especially when there are some fine elements and great performances, so I don't like to criticise, but due to these elements I could only give it this lower rating.