Showdown at Area 51 (2007)

The movie takes your mind off the elements of the world as we know it today. It also reminds us that many of our problems are just like the movie.( put in context). If you have to think about what you have read so far there is no hope for you, but don't be blind and lead those of us that can see and THINK. Face it, you guys are just jealous of the hero that you wish you were, just like me. There are not many heroes today except our Firefighters, Police, and our Warriors overseas. So it is like I said, Mel is the hero we wish we were, and if we were, we would have more than half the problems as mentioned earlier solved with no excuses. Is that clear enough!

Do you have one of those friends who takes sadistic pleasure in bringing utterly crappy z-grade sci-fi movies back from the video store? Now you know how I was forced to have this travesty irreparably burned into the synapses of my brain.Anyhow, you may have noted that I gave this utter dreck three out of ten. Was it the utterly unnecessary presence of TV's Matt Houston? Nope. The "I'm in it for the paycheck" performance of Gigi Edgley? Guess again! That's right, it was the totally unexpected presence of a mint '67 Rambler Rebel SST convertible right in the middle of the picture! "My God!" I shouted, frightening the dog and making Dave jump in his chair, "I have found a redeeming feature in this movie!" I actually watched the thing all the way to the end based on this fact, and I still could not tell you what the hell happened.

This movie was bad within the first 5 minutes. It only takes minimal research to find out some basic info about Area 51. 1. It's on a dry lake bed in the Nevada Desert. Not a whole lot of lush green vegetation in the countryside there. 2. It's an actual military installation, not a disguised park. The people at Area 51 are military and in uniform, again no disguises are necessary. So think of a dry fenced in airbase with soldiers. Not a National Park with Rangers. Anyone in uniform has his hair trimmed short and neat. Just putting on a uniform won't fool anyone closer than 50 ft. That was what I noticed in the first 5 minutes. It went downhill from there when I found out that most of the cast can't act and the plot was thin. This doesn't even belong in the Bargain Bin, If anyone makes a DVD of this it's worth more as a coaster.

Let's start with the things that are patently idiotic. Area 51 isn't in the desert as we have all been told, it's actually in a national park near St. Louis! Apparently that whole desert thing is just Government misdirection. Damn clever! Can you say "tax break for setting your film in our crappy backyard"? Apparently, a group of bad Aliens, the "Cronen" are waiting for us to generate enough pollution to meet their needs when they they will swoop in, kill us all and swipe our toxic waste. When the requisite female scientist asked the obvious question "Why kill us, we'd be glad to give them all they want for free" the only answer is "They don't negotiate". What are they, the Bush Administration? Not to mention the obvious fact that if they kill us all our ability to generate more pollution is zero, whereas if they just hauled it all away we'd make more than ever (just imagine if the EPA removed all restrictions, we would be a toxic goldmine). This is kind of like harvesting apples by cutting down the trees with a chainsaw and burning the stumps. And what kind of civilization doesn't know how to create pollution? The Bizarro world? "Me make car runs on smog and makes clean air. Me sad." Anyway, the plot revolves around a good alien sent here by someone to try to stop them by shutting down the "Omega Seed", which is the alien sensor that determines when the pollution level is adequate for harvesting. Turns out it's buried under a futuristic manhole cover in a barn. Makes you wonder what the farmer thought it was. "Dang it Clem, I done told ya not to park the tractor on the Omega Seed". The acting is semi-adequate, with the standout being Gigi Edgely, much missed since Farscape got axed ( a show superior in every conceivable way). Watching her try, and occasionally fail, to hide her Aussie accent is enchanting. The SFX and fight scenes are OK. All in all, better than most SF movies, which makes it just sub-par for anyone else.