The Zombinator (2012)

This hideous attempt at making a motion picture has to be a contestant for the worst movie EVER ! I can find absolutely NO redeeming feature in this trash. It has obviously been made by a group of juveniles who THINK they know far, far more than they do. They need to grow up, LEARN, study, watch a few hundred classic movies, and then they will realise what a piece of serious crud this flick is. For the first five minutes or so, I thought that someone must have recorded a home movie on to this DVD, which was part of a bulk lot I bought on eBay. When I saw that in fact it was the beginning of the movie, I cringed and almost threw up. It is painful to watch this, painful ! Please do NOT waste a moment of your time on this garbage. You have been warned! Rated 1 because a zero is not available to me.

It's a weird feeling when you want everyone one in this movie to be killed for all the wrong reasons.A fashion designer's documentary suddenly becomes found footage of a zombie apocalypse.I'm not sure if the acting is so bad because they want to make it look real, but the bad acting is really distracting. You can tell that this is all ab lib without a script, but I feel the acting troop needs some lessons in improv.I notice that the angles in the movie are impossible. The movie has one film crew made up of two people, yet they are capable of getting these victims from every angle and capture different people in different rooms all at once. This would not matter at all if the people they were capturing were interesting to watch. It sucked so bad I needed other things to focus on.It feels like a group of kids got together and made a Zombie movie for fun based on an interesting premise. I can appreciate that, I just couldn't watch it.

Okay, it's time to rip this steamer to pieces... While I am a huge fan of the zombie genre, this unmitigated disaster made me want to seek damages. I will never get this time back! From the insane overacting, the plot that wasn't, and the titular character ( a black trench coat clad Blade clone) who appears for about 30 seconds in the entire film, this is 85 minutes of pure horrible.I mean, you can't even make fun of it, it would be like slapping a blind kid. So if you feel the need to cause yourself pain, just drive nails into your forehead. It would be less painful and far more entertaining for those around you than subjecting yourself to this pile of crap.

Oh, goody! Just what the horror genre needs: Yet another hackneyed zombie opus done with a tired pseudo-documentary "found footage" angle ala Cloverfield and The Blair Witch Project. Well, this one strikes out something rotten in every possible way: Flat and sloppy (non)direction by Sergio Myers, zero tension or creepy atmosphere, cruddy and unconvincing CGI blood, annoying wafer-thin characters who spend way too much screen time yelling at and bickering with each other, a tediously drawn-out build-up, monotonous profanity-ridden dialogue, nausea-inducing hand-held shaky-cam nonsense, poor acting from a lame no-name cast, a trite government conspiracy subplot (yep, the government's behind the zombie outbreak), a forgettable score, and, worst of all, the pathetic wannabe cool and macho titular leather coat-clad zombie butt-stomper (a hopelessly wooden third-rate Big Arn impression by Joseph Aviel). Token name thespian Patrick Kilpatrick tries hard as an evil colonel, but he's unfortunately fighting a game, but vain uphill battle that he just ain't gonna win. To add further abject insult to already appalling injury, the use of multiple camera set-ups and different camera angles totally undermines the credibility of the whole faux documentary aspect of this turkey. Reportedly shot in a mere four and a half days without a script, this one's the absolute pits.