The Slaughterhouse Massacre (2005)

A group of guys and girls check out an old murder scene in an abandoned animal slaughterhouse. Bet you don't know what will happen next, well unless you have even a minimal amount of slasher film knowledge. Lazy, derivative, cheap, bland, and worst of all boring, this pathetic film brings absolutely nothing new, or watchable, to the table. Terrible acting, pathetic special effects,It's not even worth the bandwidth I used up watching this horrid swill on Netflix and I feel really bad for those that actually shelled out money to watch it. Even the nudity that front loaded the beginning of the movie could save this one from the trash pile.

OK. I'll make this short and sweet;; this movie is horrible! It would be absolute heaven for a ten year old boy that has never seen boobs before and wants to brag to his friends bout it. Seriously if a man comes to your door and offers you eternal life if you watch this junk tell him to clear off cause it's really not worth your energy. I'd rather be beaten by a corpse then watch this again.Oh and for anyone that says it wasn't that bad did you fall asleep during this and dream you were watching a good movie with celebrities?Only buy Slaughterhouse Massacre/Sickle if you have a death wish or your being held at gun point.One * out of ten and I'm being generous.

Nobody could accuse Paul Gagné, the writer/director of teen slasher The Slaughterhouse Massacre, of being particularly imaginative or original with his debut effort: his supernatural killer armed with a sickle is named Marty Sickle, whilst his blunt-toking stoner is called Stoner (in fact, I was surprised that there weren't characters called Victim One, Victim Two and Total Slut!). In fact, the whole story is a mish-mash of overused ideas stolen from umpteen other genre favourites.However, despite being totally uninspired and formulaic in the extreme, this trashy low-budget horror manages to be fairly entertaining fun for its duration, helped considerably by plenty of gratuitous nudity (always a slasher essential) from several rather gorgeous girls and some really hokey gore effects.A brief prologue sees a tasty death-obsessed slut convincing her boyfriend to take her to the local slaughterhouse (she slips her hand inside her panties and promises him some action when they get there); staying true to her word, once inside the abattoir, she proceeds to get nekkid and have it off with her lucky beau on the floor. Their sexy time is soon cut short, however, by the slaughterhouse's resident psycho, Marty Sickle.The film then skips to the present day, where we are introduced to a bunch of good looking high-school kids who love nothing more than to party hard. Whilst at one of their outrageous evening bashes (which includes a poolside lesbian floor-show, natch!), the pals begin to talk about the Sickle legend: apparently, after killing the couple seen in the opening scene, Marty was attacked by a lynch mob and had his neck stretched. Now, anyone stupid enough to visit the abandoned slaughterhouse and repeat a rhyme three times will resurrect the murderous spirit of the maniacal murderer. Guess what happens next....Yup... the teens do just that and get massacred. Unconvincingly.Particularly dreadful effects include a laughably bad beheading (achieved via extremely ropey CGI), a victim split vertically in half (always a winner, but it's a blink and you'll miss it gag), a terrible crotch stabbing, and a sickle through the cheek. A body which is discovered torn in half (with the entrails hanging out of the thoracic cavity) is fairly juicy, but we don't get to see the actual death.Fortunately, the supply of eye-candy is pretty much constant throughout the film, with gorgeous final survivor Stacey (Shaila Vaidya) losing the buttons on her blouse and (inexplicably) removing her mini skirt before the movie's finalé. It's not great film-making, but it kept me happy!

Sickle /Slaughterhouse MassacreIf you like movies full of bad acting, bad plot, a leading lady that cant act and a hilarious killer you will still not enjoy this movie. how bad was this movie?, well I asked for a refund the next day and the retail shop kindly refunded me. Now you know. I almost thought they made a mistake at the rental shop at the opening scene. It looked like a cheap porno movie, but it wasn't.Where to begin.The party..must be the first party in history were only beautiful women are allowed. The lack of liquor and people smoking cigarettes are overwhelming, just one smoking pot. Why do all of this kind of movie always have a beautiful actress who cant act to play the leading role? She were beyond annoyingly bad.PlotDrunk teenage college kinds gets the idea to go and visit the legendary slaughter house.(but the leading lady Mandy keep telling them let's go home).But when they accidentally revive murderer Marty Sickle all hell breaks loose . Marty sickle must be the worst killer/ghost/demon in history.The dialog in this movie are almost as bad as the acting. Not even one person cant act. Have a heart. Don't say I didn't warn you.