Abduction (2009)

ABDUCTION: The town of Process is located somewhere in rural New Jersey (where else?).It's been in existence for over 100 years, although it's not on any known map. It's a nice place to visit, with lovely shops and friendly people. That is unless you are single, young, healthy and good looking! It's even worse if you are a female of childbearing age. The town has a very lucrative underground and Internet business specializing in selling human organs for transplant, selling babies to loving couples who are barren and auctioning young women into sex slavery. They also have specialty shops which do a brisk business in antiques, leather crafts, custom wigs and used automobiles. The town's patriarch, Jacob, is in control of everything and rules the town with his nephew, Johnny, that is until they kidnap the wrong girl. Unbeknownst to Jacob and his followers, they kidnap a popular, well not popular in the United States yet, Brazilian Hip Hop Star named Bella. What follows is their attempt to dispose of ... Right off the bat...the music in the opening credits put you off. They don't fit. It sets the pace for a bad time had by all. Whomever chose this score had to be way high. It makes zero sense. And you have to sit through it through the entire opening credits!Then comes the really really bad acting where girls sound like they are reading from a cue card. Bad reading too.Then there is the cut away editing that is so choppy it's annoying.And someone actually says the Internet is the wave of the future! The film was taped in 2009!!!!! This IS the future fellows. You missed it. There is no coherent story and that music keeps coming back! Oh MYYYYY. Gag me with a spoon and shoot me in the head. This has to be one of the worst movies ever made. And IMDb says it's budget was $500K!!! Where's the money go? Crack?First victim breaks up with her BF and actually sez she went out "drive- ink." I repeat: DRIVE-INK. Where did they find these people? Then she gets tasered into a pool and they take her out with a tiny fishing net that's you'd use for trout.OMG. There is not one frame that makes sense.

Obviously, the only good reviews on this movie were submitted by people that either starred in this POS or are somehow involved in the production (and I use that word loosely). Since I watched this on Netflix, I wasn't expecting too much...and I was right. Only I didn't know how right I was until i sat through this abortion of a movie.Here's what I have concluded by watching "Abduction": -It was filmed using a Flipcam that was being operated by a monkey with Parkinson's disease. Oh, and the monkey was apparently told to film absolutely everything...everything. -It was lighted by a 4-cell MagLite -The sound was by Mr. Microphone -It was edited with Windows Movie Maker...though the film makers used restraint and decided not to go with the "star-fade" transition. -They paid the women with Sudafed so that they could make and smoke moreMeth. -The breast implant surgery on all these women was performed by the same doctor that performed Tara Reid's surgery. -I've seen better acting at my 4 year old niece's Christmas pageant.Prior reviews have said that this is the director's "Best Work!", so that means two things: 1) He's actually been allowed to make movies before and 2)this is his "best work". Heed my warning: Don't waste your time on this POS unless you really, really, REALLY have nothing better to do. And if that's the case, you should get out more...

Problem: You're a relatively ugly looking guy, and you want to see some large breasted, but rather homely otherwise, women topless. But when you ask, they just laugh at you.Solution: Buy a digital camera, and get a few of your plain friends and make a "movie" and invite these solidly average women with large breasts, I mean on a scale of 1 to 10 these "actresses" are a 6 at best even with artificial tits, to "star" in it.And the result is this film. I give it a zero for acting, but added 1 point for having the balls to release what is obviously a scam targeted at desperate women trying to "make it" in the movies well beyond their prime. I also added another point for the tits. But I subtracted that point again, since the tits were AWFUL. Whoever did the boob-jobs on these women (grandmothers?) should have their license revoked.

*SPOILERS* I bought this film from Amazon and I really liked it! I've read some really positive reviews and some negative ones as well, but being an indie film fan and a fan of previous John Orrichio films - I bought Abduction. The camera-work is his best yet with beautiful outdoor shots and disturbing lighting and effects that show how the town is twisted behind closed doors, but picturesque and normal to the outside world.It's the story of a remote New Jersey small town that is not on any map. Basically the townsfolk kidnap unsuspecting tourists and sell them into slavery, they harvest their organs for sale on the black market or make leather goods out of them! Everything starts to unravel when an up & coming pop star from South America is kidnapped and her bodyguards come to town to find her. The whole town is in on the secret. The story is original and plays out well. The first 10 minutes are a little slow, but it picks up nicely from there.As for the acting, Tony Rugnetta (Jacob) is excellent. His best role to date. Roberto Lombardi (Johnny) is perfect, convincingly evil & sexy at the same time! Christy Callas (Lilly) who is vulnerable & sinister at the same time and Gerry Kirschbaum (Doc) who has the cool demeanor of a Doctor with a hidden mania. Other notable performances are Deana Demko (Rosie) and Christina Sampson (Myrtle). There is rarely a stumble by any of the actors.I also think that to truly enjoy this film you have to take it for what it is. A low budget, well made drama / thriller that is a little creepy, a little campy/funny and a little bloody. It's not a horror film per se and it's not for everyone. If you want the thrills of a Saw movie, pass on this. If you like Rosemary's Baby, this is right up your alley. The film has gotten bashed, but I believe that is coming from former colleagues of the film maker who are bitter. Judge for yourself!!