The V Word (2006)

Why is Ernest Dickerson a Master of Horror? Because he directed Surviving the Game and Demon Knight? Hmmm. Definitely not one of the better moments of the series, yet not a total waste of time nor talent. Two youths, bored and one in particular having issues with the break-up of his family, decide to visit a morgue at night for laughs. Laughs is not what they find but rather vampires. Both get bitten eventually, and what we have here is a story about vampirism from the bitten's perspective. Been there - seen it before. The first fifteen minutes or so are very creepy and eerie. Dickerson, despite my sarcasm, has talent, but the story completely falls apart toward the middle and I couldn't even find it by the end. The acting is all acceptable. Yes, Michael Ironsides is in it. Yes, he looks very creepy. He also is given very little to do. Truth be told: I was very disappointed with this episode.

THE V WORD sees two teens breaking into a funeral home to get a look at a bully who has died. They get far more than they bargained for, as there is a vampire inhabiting the funeral home and he is perpetually thirsty. Michael Ironside is the vampire, and his method of drinking blood is to tear a large gash in the victim's throat first. Plenty of nasty corpses on display, plenty of gashed throats, but the story loses steam in the second half. It got so boring, in fact, I turned it off before the grand finale. Throat slashing is always fun to watch, but too much of it tends to spoil the broth, as it were. And I hate to say it, but Ironside reminded me more of a ghoul than a vampire. Ghouls have never floated my boat.

Two teenagers (Brandon Nadon and Arjay Smith) go to a funeral home one night to visit a cousin. They find the place completely deserted and dark...but then things start rearranging themselves, they discover blood on the floor...and one of the bodies starts moving...That's all good--but that's only the first half hour. It then turns into a strange and bloody vampirish story. Supposedly they need blood to live...but have no fangs. Also their wounds never heal. And sunlight can kill them. And they can see themselves in mirrors. This movie plays fast and loose with the vampire legend. After a while I wasn't sure WHAT they could do! It's also never explained how they became this way. It's saved by good direction and likable performances by Smith and especially Nardon--but it gets confused and dreary. Not terrible but I was wondering WHAT the point was.

All right, I have just finished watching the first showing of "The V Word" on Showtime, and having done so I have a few things to say. "The V Word" is an episode about a new-breed of vampiric legend. While they do retain many of the traditional myths, they've adapted to a new ideal.The concept for this episode is done in the best and worst of ways. While they captured the realistic nature of the idea of vampires, seeing as how rather than any psychical change they simply tear the throat of their victim out and drink the blood. Once they've had their throat removed, or at least most of it, they go through a seemingly agonizing transformation, and forever retain that physical would that never seems to heal over. It takes the idea and makes it somewhat believable, at least until the bad part comes into play.And here is that bad theme.While they've been created in this way to be believable, they seem to include some of the more silly stereotypes. These vampires do not have fangs, which makes sense, however, they burst into flames under the touch of sunlight, and it is implied that they are allergic to garlic, all though I don't think they made that official or not.It's a good episode, and a very impressive concept... however, it is insulting the basic idea of a vampire, as well as fans of the sort.However, this one does seem to have better acting than most, and it has the girl from Silent Hill in it, which amused me.Overall... I'd give this episode a 6/10.