Bulletproof (1988)

There's uber cheesy 1980s action nonsense and then there's "Bulletproof". This thing is so utterly daft it may lead one to believe that the filmmakers had their tongues in their cheeks to some degree. It's cheerfully dumb fun that should have viewers busting a gut, or shaking their heads at the ridiculousness of it all. The good guy is a seemingly indestructible goof ball and the villains are all pure one dimensional scum - not that that's a bad thing. In movies like "Bulletproof", that's what you hope for. There's plenty of explosions and plenty of gunfire; this may be stupid, but it sure as hell ain't boring.A lively, hilarious Gary Busey is cop Frank "Bulletproof" McBain, so nicknamed because of the amount of bullets that his body has taken (39 and counting). He keeps these souvenirs in a mason jar in his bathroom. He's forcibly pressed back into service by the military after they've *deliberately* allowed a super duper tank of theirs to be snatched up by terrorists. McBain, almost a one man show, takes on all comers, including a Mexican creep named Brogado (Rene Enriquez of 'Hill Street Blues'), a Libyan goon named Kartiff (a priceless Henry Silva), and a Russian thug played by the eternally bad ass William Smith.Director Steve Carver ("Big Bad Mama", "Lone Wolf McQuade") was an old hand at action by this point, and he keeps this patently absurd story moving right along. The cast is full of familiar faces, so buffs can have a good time playing Spot the Character Actor; Thalmus Rasulala ("Blacula"), L.Q. Jones ("The Wild Bunch"), Mills Watson ("Cujo"), R.G. Armstrong ("Race with the Devil"), Luke Askew ("Rolling Thunder"), Lincoln Kilpatrick ("The Omega Man"), delectable Lydie Denier ("Satan's Princess"), Juan Fernandez ("The Collector"), Redmond Gleeson ("Dreamscape"), and the great Danny Trejo all turn up as well. Smith and Silva are delicious in their roles; one has to hand it to Silva for having his swarthy villain act down pat after so many years of practice. "In my country, women have RESPECT!" Lovely Darlanne Fluegel plays McBains' former flame, one of the Army personnel who've been captured along with the tank.One need never worry about having to tax their brains when it comes to entertainment such as "Bulletproof". It's an absolute hoot from beginning to end.Eight out of 10.

"Improbable Odds. Unstoppable Force." I know it might seem hard to believe, but there once was a time when Gary Busey had a boyish charm and could have been an action star and wasn't known as a crazy guy and late-night comedian punchline. To witness this prime Busey, simply check out "Bulletproof" (not to be confused with the 1996 film where Adam Sandler shoots people).Busey plays Frank "Bulletproof" McBain, a rogue, but lovable cop on the edge. He's teamed up with the original Blacula himself, Thalmus Rasulala. One of McBain's talents is he is able to withstand being shot, and he saves all the bullets he's been shot with in a jar in his bathroom. Meanwhile, somewhere in Mexico, a terrorist network of "Mexicans, Nicaraguans and A-rabs" are all working in collusion to take over the world using a supertank called the NBT-90 Thunderblast.The evil Colonel Kartiff (Silva) and General Brogado (Rene Enriquez) are heading up the operation, so Special Ops Military Adviser Sgt. O'Rourke (Jones) and army officer Devon Shepard (Darlanne Fluegel) go south of the border to investigate. They, along with some of their army buddies and a group of priests and nuns are kidnapped and held hostage by the evildoers. Only one man can save his compatriots (and Devon, his long-lost love)...MCBAIN of course! And did we mention there are also evil Russians McBain has to stop? In the 80's, you couldn't be the hero in an action movie and not be wisecracking. Most of Busey's lines are snappy one-liners, such as "what's this Tonka toy?", "I'm a one-man suicide squad!", and he even pioneered his own insult - the immortal "Butthorn". He inexplicably says this word THREE times during the movie. I guess it didn't catch on.There are some sensitive flashbacks, and Devon even says to him "you may be bulletproof but you're not love proof". The movie on the whole is fun, upbeat and there is plenty of humor. Henry Silva plays an Islamic extremist, and the enemies are "communist-inspired terrorists". I guess it was pretty ahead of its time.Surely this was one of the only times Fred Olen Ray (who wrote the story) got a movie released by a major studio. What would the world be like today if all his movies were? A movie highlight is when Busey is tied to a big circular thing that looks like a huge cheese wheel. Watch out for this scene. So if you want to see a movie where Gary Busey is a lovable supercop and ladies man, and before he was crazy (well, really crazy) in a movie with plenty of heart, sax solos and blow-ups, and a mixed bag of world villains, this is the movie for you.For more insanity, please visit: comeuppancereviews.com

Frank "Bulletproof" McBain, a "one man suicide squad", is needed by his country, an LA Cop reinstated into the military to take on a most dangerous mission..to recapture a commandeered supertank equipped with impressive armor and weaponry, not to mention rescue his former girlfriend, Captain Devon Shepard(Darlanne Fluegel, pretty awful, but also rather amusing in how she sneers and spits venom at arch-nemesis Silva).With Henry Silva and William Smith as two of many B-movie heavies Gary Busey will have to encounter if he is to succeed in his mission. This is the kind of action film I enjoy wholeheartedly. It has a ridiculous premise where one man, in this case the awesome, one and only, Gary Busey, is able to infiltrate enemy lines(in this movie, Mexico)and eventually get his hands on the Thunderblast(the boy in me grinned ear to ear when I first heard what they named the tank)which, sufficed to say, does some serious damage to the terrorists. I would love to know the body count for this movie, because McBain certainly leaves quite a many scumbag Commies dead before all is said and done. You also have a delightfully slimy René Enríquez as General Brogado, Silva's superior, and Juan Fernández as Pantaro, the executioner who relishes gunning down American soldiers, under the command of LQ Jones(as Sgt. O'Rourke), in cold blood. RG Armstrong even shows up as Miles Blackburn, the one responsible for forcing McBain back into action. If you are gonna start an action film, I prefer the way BULLETPROOF does, with Busey, and his poor partner(who just wants to call back up)halting a gun smuggling operation in progress with plenty of gunfire erupting, leading to an ice cream truck(used to carry the smuggled weapons!)tipping over and exploding. As you expect, done in flashback of course, Busey is haunted by a partner's accidental death, at the hand of Smith. Danny Trejo has a small part as one of the gun smugglers who attempts to stop Busey from arresting him, by firing a machine gun out the back of the ice cream truck at him while he was in hot pursuit. I'm a strong supporter in opening a loud, dumb action flick with a reckless cop(with a death wish, it seems)exchanging rounds of ammunition with criminals resulting in dead bodies and explosions. You get the hilarious, but so stupendously radical, scene where Busey is bound to a wheel which is sent turning down a hill thanks to a grenade triggered by Fluegel, saving him from being Juan Fernández's target practice. Or, the town showdown as Brogado's militia, with something like four tanks and an endless supply of Arabs, against the Thunderblast which decimates everything in sight. Silva and Fluegel have spirited spats with one another(you gotta love Silva who snarls as well as any hissable villain)with the Captain getting even with him towards the end(he rapes her, determined to prove his point that all women are to respect him). But, it's all about Busey..who gets to slide into the "one man army" role, and this fan, for one, had a grand old time seeing Gary at play. Busey sure seems to be having a ball as the hero, more often than not he's the one as a villain, not vice versa. Hilarious how the Thunderblast can withstand not only four tanks and constant missiles, but also a Russian helicopter(a Soviet Mi-24 as mentioned by Busey while the Thunderblast is under assault by the aircraft machine) as well..we sure made one hell of a really impressive machine, this supertank. The plot and characters are silly, so if one enters BULLETPROOF expecting anything other than goofy action fare with tons of violence, you best stay as far away from this flick as possible. An 80's action movie after my own heart, it defies logic almost at every turn..as these movies are supposed to do, when Silva and company have Busey right where they want him, instead of shooting him immediately, they postpone which leads to his inevitable freedom from their clutches.

There is only one use for a film such as Bulletproof: it reminds you just how bad bad can be. We often see films which we describe as "pretty awful" or "not much good", but then you come across a film like this and you can see that although all those other films aren't "good" they are no way as stinkingly bad as Bulletproof. This was a birthday gift from someone who spent less than two seconds rummaging thru' the DVD bargain bin at our local superstore to fulfil an obligation (i.e. to give me a present). It could have been a serendipitous find but it wasn't: this is so utterly clichéd, so badly written, so poorly directed, so badly acted that I'm surprised everyone involved hasn't been arrested and sent down for 10 years. God, it's awful. I suspected as much from about 30 seconds in, but carried on because sometimes - sometimes - bad films are so bad they can be enjoyable. This isn't one of them. It is simply bad. I stopped watching after 45 minutes, and tomorrow I shall throw it in the bin.