1313: Hercules Unbound! (2012)

I'm a huge fan of trash cinema but there's nothing to this. It's like flipping through the pages of a magazine. They're not saying much, not doing much. Every scene with dialogue is zoomed in so you don't notice they're inside a porn mansion. Nobody really acts in this film, they spit out lines. Everyone looks like they're gonna kiss, they don't. There's no allure at all. I don't know how much more soft this ultra soft core has to go with itself.

Hard to watch all the way through...the only thing that kept my interest was looking for the goofs: In the pool scenes that was supposed to be Mount Olympus, there were Christmas tree lights wrapped around the palm trees; barbed wire fencing in background; a flag pole; gas BBQ on patio in scene and patio chairs; shot of Parthenon in Greece had scaffolding in shots ( they could have photo- shopped them out); indoor scene had glass reflection in background; etc. Music was good. Plot was very simple. The only action outdoor scenes, so far, are the pool area over and over and over again. The guy Hercules kills at pool has a tattoo of Texas on his body too. They should have titled his Body Building 101.

This movie was almost everything I've ever wanted. It had shirtless guys, Party City headpieces, wrestling, more shirtless guys... Would have been a 10/10 if there had at least been a little kissing. Maybe a fondle. Anyone looking to further their knowledge of Greek mythology, enjoy a rousing good time with the kids, ensure a second date with that hottie from the gym, or simply impress the gang at "girls' night" should definitely add this to their Netflix instant queue. Never have I been more impressed with a film. The story of Hercules, told with the grace, integrity, and sex appeal it deserves. Three thumbs up, David DeCoteau. You truly are a man among men.

Poor acting. Can see a lot of reflections in the windows. I was very disappointed but you would think that after watching, 2 other 1313 movies, I would have known better. These actors are gorgeous to look at, but that is all that is good about the movie. I don't suggest any of the 1313 movies. What I can suggest is that the production company look at better structure to their movie. Another thing is that there is a lot of music and movement and not enough speaking and story behind what is going on. Also a poor job with allowing the house to show up in the background. This movie makes me want to puke. I can see why they used so much money as there is so much music. I am sure the actors were under paid!