Double Blast (1994)

Despite having one of the shorter careers among the crop of early-90s action heroes, Dale Cook nonetheless found the time to try and make stars out of a couple of kids he might have chosen at random from the local karate school. The vehicle he co-stars them in would be his only PG-rated film to date, and also the only one of his which features established stars that the average American viewer would recognize. Seeing how disappointing this one turned out, it seems like a waste of resources...The story: When Jimmy (Lorne Berfield) and Lisa (Crystal Summers) - the children of kickboxing champion Greg Matthews (Cook) - witness the kidnapping of an archaeologist (Linda Blair) by a gangster looking to find a lost treasure (Joe Estevez), they take it upon themselves to save her by employing their martial talents.I have to admit, Lorne Berfield and Crystal Summers definitely look like they've had some legitimate martial arts training, and the script is so weak that they can't really be held accountable for their dramatic shortcomings, but honestly, I'm not surprised that these two didn't have much of a career in movies. They have little charisma, and their characters are a whiny duo whose physical competence is largely the result of the sheer incompetence of the goofy henchmen they beat up again, and again, and again. Even Joe Estevez's character is a pathetic goof who's easily foiled by slapstick antics. Surrounded by such buffoonery, Dale Cook himself manages to look like a decent actor, but the only standout dramatic parts are delivered by Linda Blair, in some weird-out scenes wherein she's hypnotized and some reverted back to childhood.The film's heavy-handed comedy begs you to not take the movie seriously, but comedy itself isn't very funny if you're older than six or seven. The majority of the villains are so stupid and the majority of the physical comedy is so poorly set up that it's almost embarrassing to watch, like a college production gone awry. This bleeds over to the martial arts content, which - while ample - doesn't deliver what anyone who's already seen a couple of karate flicks could want. There are ten fights, but most of these gimmicky, one-sided encounters wherein the kids beat up Robert Z'dar and Chuck Williams. The vastly underrated Ron Hall shows up in the beginning and end of the movie to do some flips and throw some kicks, but while his fight with Dale Cook is the best of the picture, it's tarnished by speedy editing.The muddy production values make the film visually indistinguishable from the rest of Cook's work, but even the Apollo of the kickboxing circuit has done better than this. If you're really interested in this for some reason, don't buy it for over a couple of bucks, and otherwise don't bother with it at all.

Greg (Cook) is a professional kickboxer who has a son, Jimmy (Berfield), and a daughter, Lisa (Summer), who take after their father and also are proficient in Martial Arts. When a gang of no-goodniks led by Nadir (Estevez) and his number one goon Mongoose (Z'Dar) kidnap archaeologist Claudia (Blair) because she can translate an ancient stone tablet said to lead to the whereabouts of great riches, the kidnapping is witnessed by Lisa and Jimmy. They follow the baddies into the jungle, and are soon followed by their dad. So now everyone, good guys and bad guys alike, are trekking through jungles and caves to try and find the treasure. Who will end up with it? Ah, to be a kid in the 90's. You could go to your local video store, rent Double Blast and maybe a Genesis game, then go home and watch Wild and Crazy Kids while eating your Fruit By The Foot. It's a nice scenario, and surely one that the filmmakers at Davian International (the people behind most of Dale "Apollo" Cook's movies) were aiming for. Double Blast is nothing if not an attempt to crack the market of younger kids seeking action thrills, and in the attempt making a sort of cross between Home Alone (1990), The Goonies (1985) and Three Ninjas (1992) (one of Berfield's only credits is a "thank you" on Three Ninjas - was he a young consultant, a stunt-kid, or was he in the running to be one of the Ninjas? We may never know...) Seeing as how the Martial Arts fights aren't all that different from Cook's other movies, if such a designation exists, this movie would surely be a hard PG.Cook carries over his time-honored sweatpants-and-fannypack look into this movie. Why an acknowledged action star of the time insisted on dressing like a tourist in every one of his films remains a mystery. Lorne Berfield, the kid who played Jimmy, was very good and seemed to have a promising career ahead of him. Sadly it never materialized. Linda Blair is along for the silly ride, and Joe Estevez chews scenery as the main baddie. Robert Z'Dar holds up his end of the wackiness on show, and this is the only credited performance of Crystal Summer, who's not a porn star as far as we know. There are some other names in the cast fans will know, such as Ron Hall, who flips around and fights in a full suit, John Barrett, who's Cook's fight trainer, and Ned Hourani, who plays one of the baddies who is constantly getting beat up by children.Director Tim Spring was certainly on a tear in the mid-90's, having directed Reason to Die (1990), Double Blast, and Raw Target (1995) all in a row. The golden age of the video store brought out the best in people, and gave us more choices than ever before. What's good about Double Blast is that it's at least upbeat, and there's no annoying kid, which there easily could have been. There are zany "BOING!" sound effects while the children are beating up the grown-ups, and characters read newspapers with grammatical errors in them. Lisa has a boyfriend (Lisa has a boyfriend!) named Charlie (Stephen Brause, in his only role) who looks exactly like TV's Zack Morris. Maybe that's why Brause never went on to anything else. The world already had a Zack.But perhaps the most interesting thing, from today's standpoint, about Double Blast is how characters call each other "retard" as an insult. You CANNOT do that today. Or maybe you could, but your movie would be rated R, and you'd be accused of bullying and defamation and sued within an inch of your life. It's all done without malice, it truly was a more innocent time back then, people didn't know what they were saying. In the end, we watched Double Blast because of the very impressive cast, but the movie is certainly geared for younger viewers. Not unlike Little Ninjas (1990). It's pretty dumb, but the cast basically keeps it afloat. If you have occasion to watch something of this kind, you could probably do worse than Double Blast.For more action insanity, drop by: www.comeuppancereviews.com

Linda Blair stars as a scientist who is kidnapped (repeatedly) by mobsters who want her expertise on some priceless ancient artifacts that tells where buried treasure is, of course the bad guys have her now but kickboxing champion Dale "Apollo" Cook is there to save the day and even if he brings his obnoxious kids with,Cook if he has to, will put a boot in your head. I don't remember American Kickboxer 2 too much (I saw it when the thing came out) but Dale "Apollo" Cook is probably the best thing about this movie. He doesn't talk much and just kickboxes which easily puts him ahead of the actor and actress playing his obnoxious offspring, however he fights a lot and even though these fight sequences are very badly staged, he does look like under the right circumstances could center a cheap-jack martial arts time killer. Linda Blair is aboard for some reason, because at this point it was either this or porn. So we are left with scenes of her pretending to be a child, her grumbling while forced into a car, her trying to act intelligent and so on. Robert Z'Dar is also here and the terminally bored cast go through the terminally boring adventures that the plot requires. The movie is aggressively abysmal and should be avoided as such.1/2* out of 4-(Awful)

Double Blast and Skullduggery are two of the worst movies ever made, and they make an insanely entertaining double feature. Double Blast is definitely the more watchable of the pair, though, since it actually has some semblance of a story, no matter how lame it gets at times. I have to admit, I bought this for its low price ($3.99, which may be too much, now that I think back), and by the cover. How the heck do you just pass up a movie with a kickboxing family guarding treasure as its cover? You can't, honey baby, and that's the skinny, ya hear? And to my utter amazement and joy, two of my favorite actors are in this movie! It's bizarre how I tend to buy films that I have connections to without knowing it, but if anyone is a dedicated MST3k viewer like me, they will instantly recognize Joe Estevez and Robert Z'Dar. Robert has to be seen to be believed. The man's face looks like a potato, and believe me when I say that such a statement is NOT an exaggeration. His face is so hilariously puffed up that it sent me into hysterics. And of course Joe is a member of the prestigious Estevez dynasty of acting, which also includes Emilio, AKA Mighty Ducks 3. Both of these men were together in another film, Soultaker, and to think that they would be paired up again is just too good to be true...but it is! There is no way that I would ever sell my beloved Double Blast. It's home is with me from here on out, and I will forever threaten my friends with its awesome craptitude. Oh, and be sure to watch out for the biggest continuity error in film history during one of the outdoor scenes. Believe me, it's so obvious that no person could possibly miss it. 4/4 stars!