The Brown Bunny (2004)

How many films can Vinny make about male menopause? Lower testosterone,receding gums... Getting old sucks but the Dago Woody Allen will have a difficult time re-inventing himself next time: "The Prostate Affair (Always Gotta Go)" written and directed by Vincent Gallo.Plus how did he get away with a real porn scene? Wouldn't that make the movie X-rated? Seriously, this guy is Woody Allen born Italian Catholic. Like Camille Paglia and Anna DiFranco, still unwashed wops from the provinces of upstate NY. Christ, am I glad I was born and braised in NYC.Have cousins in Middletown...I don't know, out-of-towners are destroying NYC.

There are two things about Gallo I really like: uncompromising, experimental. But Brown Bunny just doesn't work. The ending actually is excellent, the 'famous scene' isn't gratuitous and the plot is in fact engaging .... when you read it in 1 minute on Wikipedia.But the movie itself is very frustrating. No you won't find the usual Hollywood tropes, but the finished product feels indulgent to the utmost. Better editing would have helped but cut the movie far too short. Gallo seemed to have run out of ideas beyond the 4 mains scenes and fillers abound, to the point where the movie was probably unsalvageable by the time it was shot.A missed opportunity.

The Satellite of Love crew would've had a field day. Manos: The Hands of Fate's opening scene stretched amongst about 60 min of film. Wait, there's more! Within the first 2/3s of the film we have the hero do amazing things! He buys gasoline & Chinese food! He drinks coffee! He buys a Coke! He takes a shower! He kisses a complete stranger in a park! But wait! There's more! Most importantly, he drives! And drives and drives. And then…drives some more. Watching someone drive such a distance is like watching someone read for an hour. I have read reviews where people complain nothing happens. I laugh at the movies they pick for these comments? They need to go back to edit their reviews on those movies. This could've been rated G until the finale, a completely unnecessary sexual scene (or two). We get the point; we get to the surprise twist. I watched to the end, every minute of his journey from the East to the West; his loneliness. Yes, I liked the ending, the reason for all the madness but for shock value alone was the graphic closing scenes. I gave it 1.5/5, an additional .5 for the meaning at the end. I'll be kind & save you some time? He is lonely and depressed, he drives and if you can skip to the final 2-3 scenes, you'll understand why & save yourself 1.25 hours of watching one drive to get to the point. I have two side notes: #1 I am a true believer in extras on a DVD, the delete scenes, the making-of, etc, and thank GOD, this had no delete scenes? Boy, anyone could do without extra **exciting** hours of driving from Albuquerque 2 Vegas. And #2, though I love Las Vegas scenes in movies – I'm a gambler, sue me- he would've taken a long detour to go from where he was headed to Sin City. Don't screenplay writers ever research their material, their physical journeys before putting pen to paper? This is a story of one man, his journey and a director's vision of hard porn for about 3 min. Buckle up, it's gonna take you 90 min to get what you rented the film for.

I watched Brown Bunny because I saw it listed in a list of the top fifty controversial films by TimeOut New York. After laughing out loud for about a half hour at how nothing had happened yet, I decided to just fast forward through the long boring scenes of driving. When a song started to play and I was forced to look through a bug splattered windshield at the road I simply fast forwarded until the song ended. I did this at least three or four times. Also, when scenes in which I knew nothing was going to happen began, such as when he drives into a gas station and I know already based on the rest of the film that nothing is going to happen except him pumping some gas, I fast forwarded. I watched the scenes in which something was happening, like when he hugged the woman at the rest stop or picked up the young hooker and kept fast forwarding through the driving until I got to the end and I watched that. The entire crux of the entire film can be watched in about half an hour and that still isn't any good.