Snakehead Terror (2004)

Honestly, with the movie going on I'm becoming more and more speechless. How in the world could someone produce a movie like this other than being completely drunk.So please do not watch this one unless you really don't have anything else to do and/or are drunk - I guess it could be somewhat enjoyable in that case xD------------------------- Spoiler alert!!! -------------------------It all begins with the never ending stigma of a sheriffs daughter that isn't getting enough love from daddy. Of course his wife had died a few years before and he doesn't like his daughters boyfriend. Well - Some mega-mutant snakehead-fish kill both the boyfriend and some other dude with + his dog. Not that they're just killing them, they're completely lacerating them. So far so good. The good sheriff goes to visit the city's major to convince him of sealing the whole lake off. Which seems to be kind of a good idea given the fact that it looks like there's some pretty feisty little animal out there. The completely ridiculously appearing major whatsoever sends him away, saying that it would be bad for the economy of the city to do so. The sheriff isn't happy with that but moves on. Understandably, cause, I mean what could possibly go wrong, right? Some days and corpses later it all becomes a public event. Hundreds of fishermen come cheerfully into the little city to see what's behind that story of the Mutant-Snakeheads. They even hand out T-Shirts ("I survived the snakehead terror")As a matter of course, the sheriffs daughter - who doesn't seem to be that broken-hearted after all - decides to go hunt for the Snakeheads. The next hour is pretty simple to describe. Some dude had punched growth hormones into the see for months to help the fish grow for economic reasons. Little sheriff's daughter gets in trouble. More and more people die - "epic" fight in the end of which I must admit, that it's outcome really leaves the viewer happy...-> ...cause it meant the movie was finally over.

Now I don't mind B movies, there have been plenty that is have been critical failures yet I liked, even with their flaws. Snakehead Terror is a real shocker and not in a good way, in fact it is a "so bad, it's bad" sort of movie.So what did I hate about Snakehead Terror? Let's see shall we? 1) An awful script, with lines so bad they bring unintentional humour at their own stupidity. - check 2) A poorly structured and completely predictable story that holds no surprises and is poorly resolved, as the climax like the script is so insane it's funny. Liked the premise but was executed awfully. - check 3) Some terrible acting, either by those who can't act for toffee or those who try so hard their talents are wasted. Bruce Boxleitner was the sole bright spot - check 4) Every cliché and rip off in the book. Monster, child in peril, sheriff, obnoxious teenagers and a love interest. - check 5) Poorly designed monster that is not intelligent but instead rather dumb, with a laughable means of opportunity. - check 6) None of the characters are remotely likable and do things that are both illogical and silly. - check 7) Sloppy direction.- check 8) The visuals are nothing special really. Scenery is okay, camera work is not. -check 9) Poor pacing with very long drawn out scenes that make you reach for the fast forward button. -check 10) Complete overkill of supermodel jokes. -check 11) Pretty awful CGI and the gore was suitably gory but overdone. -check12) Geographical errors such as the Alleghany Mountains being the only mountains in the state, and doesn't have a snow capped mountain, unlike the one in the film.- check So overall, as others have put it hysterically awful, yet it is something I "kind of" recommend. 1/10 Bethany Cox

The folks who complain about the awfulness of this movie don't seem to have an appreciation of the fine art of B-movies. Why would anyone watch something called "Snakehead Terror" and NOT expect it to be cheesy? I saw this movie under perfect conditions - on late-night cable in a hotel room in Bangkok - and I can tell you that it met all of my expectations. Moderate acting skills, the requisite spunky teenagers, monsters that attacked with predictable regularity, absurd coincidences, laughs both intentional and unintentional, and several surprising scares. Not to mention a surprisingly high body count. (I was surprised how MANY of the spunky teenagers became fish food.) Watch this with the right mind-set (i.e., it ain't "Lawrence of Arabia" or "Jaws"), and you'll have a grand old time.

For a Sunday afternoon cable movie, this was actually pretty good. Nice scenery. Bruce Boxlietner (who looks more and more like Bill Clinton...spooky) and former supermodel Carol Alt gave decent performances. And there were a few clichés that were avoided. Doc (the actor who was the Cigarette-Smoking Man on X-FILES) was behind the whole mess but he wound up arrested instead of being fed to the fish. The sheriff and the scientist didn't fall in love. Best of all, the sort of dopey deputy who had a crush on the scientist didn't get fed to the fish either. The mayor (who had really neat eyebrows) channeled Murray Hamilton long enough to give his little speech about how the town needs the tourist business so the beach must not be closed) and then vanishes from the plot.Sure, this wasn't that original. The writer and director have obviously seen JAWS many times. The scene with the upside-down boat proved that (and there's no way I'd ever fire a gun while standing on an overturned boat but I guess a good guy's gun doesn't have recoil). There were some major plot holes in that this seemed to be a rather tiny town but people like the guy from the local newspaper and his photographer could go missing and people didn't think it strange. The final siege in the house was very much like THE KILLER SHREWS, but that may have been coincidence. And the ending was lifted whole cloth from JAWS 2 except the electricity went to the critters instead of one critter chomping down on a bazillion watt power line.But in its own way it was fun. And compared to the usual Sci-Fi Channel movies it was a work of brilliance. With the exception of TERMINAL INVASION most of their original movies haven't been just tired, they've been exhausted.Maybe with this one the actors had a nice vacation and got in some boating and fishing on their days off. And for a made for TV movie there's a surprising lot of blood and gore, both fish and human. The shot of the headless corpse spurting blood on the windshield was memorable, to say the least.Best of all, this wasn't so dependent on computer generated effects. I've seen too many movies on that station that looked like video games.Look for the appearance by the singing wall-mounted fish in the house where the final siege takes place. It sings "Don't Worry, Be Happy," and is a very nice touch.Turn your brain off, get some snacks (or some sushi if you really want to get into it) and enjoy.