Ultra Warrior (1990)

An incomprehensible mess, Ultra Warrior is far and away the most relentless assault on the senses I have been subjected to in ages. With footage "borrowed" from who-knows-how-many other films, the final product is little more than a string of explosions with a threadbare story about Dack Rambo being sent into a radioactive wasteland to evaluate mining potential, and being drawn into a bloody war between mutants and slave-drivers.A painful test of endurance, but surely a badmovie monger's dream, Ultra Warrior is a must-see-to-believe experience. You will *never* mock another movie again.1/10

And yet, with "Ultra Warrior" and a couple dozen other movies, Roger Corman has done just that. Ever since he invested a couple million dollars in "Battle Beyond the Stars" he's been making zero budget sci-fi and action movies re-using the same footage. "Ultra Warrior" is particularly bad, though, because the plot and all the exposition exists simply to hold together bits of other movies.It is amusing, though. The plot involves this dude working for some big brother corporation in the future investigating mining a miracle mineral in an area controlled by mutants (and of course, evil mutant hunters) who eventually becomes "the chosen one". Every time two characters talk the film cuts away to "Lords of the Deep" or "Battle Beyond the Stars" to show us this giant fantastical plot that's supposedly going on at the same time. It's ridiculous, but that's why it's entertaining.There are also two pretty good action sequences that were actually originally filmed for this movie, so it's worth watching even if you have seen all the source material.*quote from Welles's "The Other Side of the Wind"

The "stolen" material is pretty entertaining in how it is reused, and re framed by goofy narratives ("... anyway ...") - especially if you are familiar with - and a fan of - the source materials they are sampling. (Battletruck!!) And the President is none other than Godfather Roger Corman.Maybe a spoof, or maybe a tribute. Perhaps just a comedy. Whatever it was, it was SUPPOSED to be "bad!"Hmmm. It might be exactly made for the demographic that likes to do the Mystery Science Theater thing DIY, and sit around with friends and 'OMFG!' at how bad a movie can be. Hey wait, that's been me, too .... oh well. I reckon I'm OK with being a sucker for stuff like this. You could do a lot worse - and not much better. Even when it's not that funny, it's sure to be awesome."F*** their classics, these are MY classics!" - Max Wasteland

If ever there was a movie that needed MST3K to cover, this was it. This is not a movie to see alone, as you may suffer brain hemorrhages. If you want to practice picking out continuity errors and shouting out comments, this the movie to do it with. There is so much footage taken from other movies, I'm pretty sure that the only original shots are those with the actors in the movie-and even that is doubtful. This movie is so horrible that it makes you seriously wonder how it could have been made. On average, you'll cringe about once every three minutes. There are so many holes in the plot and script, that it's full...of...well, really big holes. If you enjoy fine cinema, you'll never even be in the same section as this video. Still, Ultra Warrior has found a place near and dear to my heart. Just about everyone I know has seen it at least once at my urging. There's just something about the way that the cast and crew knew that they were making a movie that would possibly never see the light of day. No effort is made to hide the impossible jumps in the plot, the disturbingly poor special effects, the incredibly cheesy delivery of lines, or the smashingly choppy scene cuts. In fact, they revel in it. This is a movie that the people making it had fun doing. Or they were all completely insane. Completely.But it's fun. I recommend it. A little.