Orgy of the Dead (1965)

>>> Warning: Sarcasm Emminent <<< How can you go wrong with dialog like this: "Your Puritan upbringing holds you back from my monsters, but it certainly doesn't hurt your art of kissing".The year was 1965 and one of Hollywood's most regal figures had something really HOT cooking in the kitchen, truly one for the ages, I'm talking about Ed Wood: The King of the Shlockmeister's (and renowned cross-dressing pervert) and his monstrously epic magnum-opus ORGY OF THE DEAD! A most lavish of B-productions, set in the nighted realm of a haunted cemetery and brilliantly filmed in "Gorgeous Astravision and Shocking Sexicolor" ORGY OF THE DEAD is grand in it's ability to allure and transfix - never before has one been witness to such a spectacle of thee exotic! And when you hit the play-button, a marvelously mad mix of graveyard sensuality and horror's of the night await you and all it's tantalizingly sweet tortures will indeed tickle the very fiber of your being. As your screen becomes radiantly aglow, in a divine aura of necromantical omnipotence as it BESIEGES YOUR SOUL..... and yet the orgy to end all orgies is just warming up! Ripe with lush extravagance, eye-candy is everywhere, as the ORGY OF THE DEAD casts it's sexy spell upon it's viewers young and old alike, with it's seductive charm and it's singularly spellbinding palette of sultry hue's and lush, super-sensual musical cue's. This godly, grand guignol of graveyard-goofiness possess a certain "frenzied rhythmic fury" which often reaches never-before seen or imagined levels red hot, hyper-kinetic depictions of.......... dancing naked in the moonlight, in a cemetery, to a small gaggle of Adam's Family side-characters and generic, cliché-ridden, rejects from various well-worn monster movies of the past. In other words, PURE CHEESE as only Ed Wood can do it! That being said Eddie-boy was not the big cheese/director of ORGY OF THE DEAD, but he was definitely central to it's creation.Speaking of Ed Wood, with ORGY OF THE DEAD he got yet another chance to strut his many talents, functioning as: writer, production manager, casting agent and a holder-of-cue-card's and no doubt was a glowing inspiration to have on the set; Ed proved to be a highly inspired and versatile individual, know doubt a character of many interesting facet's. Directorial duties for this infamously eccentric production, was helmed by the universally well-known, visionary, director A.C. Stephen, a legendary talent known for his uncompromising genius, comic sensibilities and overall command of the set. You'll find ORGY OF THE DEAD to be both throbbing in pace and masterful in it's play of light (and all shades in between), thus, off-setting, to brilliant effect, the lustful carnal fire that is ORGY OF THE DEAD! Over-seeing all that goes on in his nighted realm, is CRISWELL: the movies narrator, it's master-of-ceremonies and god of primal darkness and ultimately he's one VERY strange duck; who wears a cape and has extremely awesome looking "butter-sculpture hair". The nights entertainment features a bevy of tantalizing hellborn beauties, who emerge one after another from a fog-shrouded crypt in the night. The girls dance until dawn for their master's own selfish pleasure, who as one observes, seems alternatingly bored or ecstatic about the sashaying in the cemetery. Criswell's a real hoot - and a riot. The cemetery is perpetually shrouded in fog, it's ever-present, swirling, night mists ebbing and flowing, enrapturing you in it 's velvety allure..... as it constantly caresses your eyes - sinister, but stately. It's that type of dark, lurid imagery that perfectly counter-balance's the films sheer eroticism, with all it's garish lighting, glowing flesh-tones and masses of sweet flesh - writhing and undulating.The story (if you wanna call it that) is wrapped around a young couple (Bob and Shirely) who are, driving around lost at night, they swerve and go off the road, thrown clear of their car, they awaken completely uninjured (Bob sports one frivolous smudge of blue body-paint on his forehead, undoubtedly meant to be a bruise). The couple starts to walk away from their wrecked car and soon they hear some strangely enchanting sounds in the near distance, shortly thereafter they spot the enchanted graveyard and it's curiously wacky inhabitants and all it's nude hi-jinx and they waste no time in going into full-on voyeur mode. Eventually they're spotted and abducted by minions of the master, in other words, two guys in cheesy, pseudo-scary costumes. Brought before the master (that being Criswell of course) their bound to a pair of stone obelisk's, where they pretend not enjoy the rest of the show. Criswell takes quite a liking to the busty red-headed Shirely and curiously enough, Criswell's voluptuous, pale skinned, mistress of the night (sort of an Elvira precursor) is even more taken by good old Shirely (played by the gorgeous Pat Berrington/Berringer) who want's her for herself; so much so that she attempts to kill Shirely with a dagger, so she can join them in their world of the undead. But as luck would have it, the morning sun rises conveniently just in time and vanquishes the evil spirits of the night - Criswell and his minions are reduced to skeletons and ash. Pat Barrington/Barringer plays a dual-role, being both Shirely and she's also one of the dancers, the 3rd of a series ten dancers (and probably the best), titled as the "Gold Girl" and for her dance scene she's wearing a platinum blonde wig and a sequin-studded G-string. A terrific scene by the way. She was a professional belly-dancer of some regard and it certainly shows. Note* Youtube has some great, vintage, topless dancing footage of hers.Side-Note: A Shirely of another kind - By sheer coincidence, whilst writing this review I was imbibing on a "Dirty Shirley" a feather-weight concoction of cherry schnapps and 7-UP.This great vintage T & A fest is absolutely perfect for an "adult themed" Halloween party ;)

Terrible movie that was "written" (you mean there was actually a script to this??) by Edward D. Wood Jr. though he didn't direct it. You could have fooled me, as the incompetence of Stephen C. Apostolof is just as bad - or maybe worse! There's nothing that happens in this film after a man and woman driving in a car have an opening scene crash. They subsequently become captives of an "emperor" (the nutty Criswell, wearing the actual Dracula cape that Bela Lugosi donned for ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET FRANKENSTEIN) and his female vamp assistant (who looks a lot like TV hostess Elvira). They tie their two victims to stakes and they're forced (as we are) to watch a bevy of topless women individually introduced to do all sorts of long and ultimately boring solo dances. Some of them are less sleep-inducing than others (the cat woman was okay), but they all drone on too much amidst an atmosphere of gloomy fog which often obstructs our view of the best parts anyway. What's unintentionally funny are the occasional inserts of Criswell watching from the sidelines and making lame expressions when he's not obviously reading from cue cards. He's also got at least one funny politically incorrect line which he says to his male captor: "Nobody wants to see a man's ass!" (Heh Heh Heh). Things get even more ridiculous when The Wolf Man and The Mummy (two guys in cheap Halloween costumes) drop by to watch the festivities. * out of ****

This movie is Ed Wood on drugs. Man is it awful. But if you like Ed Wood you must watch it. It is a silly plot of a couple stumbling on a graveyard of dead exotic dancers being whipped and semi-nude. They are tied at stakes(not real well either) and forced to watch the orgy of the dead.Also on hand are a silly looking mummy and wolf man.The infamous Criswell as the emperor and his cohort Ghoulita emcee the great dance. You will have the impulse to fast forward because you start to lose it after awhile. Some of the dancing is worth watching for belly laughs , especially the pussy cat whipping dance.The music sounds like its from the Jackie Gleason Show. Classic. Criswell makes some interesting comments as the evening goes on. The hero of the movie is the sun as it comes out early and destroys all in view. Have some alcohol handy as you watch this, it will help. Remember The pussycat was born to be whipped.

If you are an admirer of Edward D. Wood, Jr. prepare or better yet, brace yourself, yet again.While Ed did not direct this spook-fest, he did write the screenplay (so to speak) based on a novel which he also penned for general release, primarily at fine bookstores which also carried magazines like 'Dude', 'Rogue', 'Nugget' and 'Gent.' For 'ORGY OF THE DEAD' is not so much a horror movie but a beyond the grave burlesque show featuring a bevy of beauties summoned by that master seer himself, Criswell. Look deep into Criz's eyes as he reads from his cue cards and glances up at the camera lens every so often. For this role, Criswell's cape was originally worn by Bela Lugosi as 'Dracula' in 'ABBOTT & COSTELLO MEET FRANKENSTEIN'. The only humor available in this cemetery plot, though, are between the Wolfman(Rod Lindeman)and the Mummy(Louis Ojena), reminiscent of 'PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE's wise-cracking cops, Paul Marco and Conrad Brooks.A.C. Stephen(Stephen C. Apostolof) directs this flick, with an affectionate nod to the screenwriter. The opening scene takes place in broad daylight with a 1965 Corvair convertible taking in some mountainous curves until the next turn when, in true Ed Wood time management fashion, it suddenly becomes night and then day again along the same mountain pass. The driver(William Bates)delivers his lines to his girlfriend passenger(Pat Barrington)as if he's narrating a documentary on how "Unsafe At Any Speed" the Chevrolet Corvair is. Kudos to Ralph Nader because, wouldn't you know it, this Corvair crashes, too. Pat Barrington (sometimes billed as Barringer) plays a double role here as 'Shirley' and 'The Gold Girl'. (Criswell goes over the top here as he memorably intones "More Gold, More Gold!"). Miss Barringer would soon play lead in 'THE AGONY OF LOVE'. When Criswell starts drooling in 'Shirley's direction, she lets go with a "blood-curdling" scream(not once mind you, but twice)sounding as anemic as the budget for an Edward D. Wood, Jr. production. Actually, Pat Barringer's 'talents' were displayed to best advantage in Russ Meyer's classic 'MONDO TOPLESS.' Go, Pat, Go!This brings us to the real reason to view 'ORGY OF THE DEAD.' In spite of Criswell's rants from his coffin about "Monsters to be pitied, Monsters to be despised," the real show is provided by the likes of 'Texas Starr', 'Bunny Glaser','Rene de Beau' and more grind house marquee starlets. Professional exotic dancers with their own bizarre themes set to music perform for Criswell's pleasure in Astra Vision and Sexicolor, no less.The music sounds like a cocktail lounge blend between Martin Denny and Les Baxter. Actually, the score is provided by Jaime Mendoza Nava, conducting The Chilean Symphony Orchestra(really!). These cryptic chicks dance and bounce topless(no pasties,thankfully) with panties or a G-string. "The Bride" who frugs and jerks to her husband's skeleton and the "Cat Woman" are highlights, but hey, these haunted honeys are all Screaming Mimis even if they don't make a sound and don't always dance in sync to the music, as if that really matters. So don't be surprised afterward if you find yourself baying at the moon at full port. You Have Been Warned!