Satan's Playground (2006)

This is by no means meant to be taken seriously as a film as it's a film based on a silly tale of the Jersey Devil (like Bigfoot,Yeti,The Mothman) it's a bogeyman made up to keep people out of the desolate Pine Barrens region who from what I understand is miles upon miles of wooded area,that's easy to get really lost in.The old lady was supposed to be the ghost of the woman who bore The Jersey Devil,Mrs Leeds &it seems both she & 2 of her half-wit kids rob & murder anyone who's car breaks down & if they don't get you the Satanists who sacrifice their victims to the Devil & "his son"will.This reminded me of a great 80's B-movie from Troma called Mothers Day.The actresses are 2 of my favorites from previous B horror films.The lead is Felissa Rose from Sleepaway Camp fame & her sister in the film is Ellen Sandweiss from The Evil Dead, who is the chic who gets some horrible tree love & then is the first to go demonic in the film,well in this she is a terrorized Mom w/h a baby. Both actresses are NEVER going to be top Hollywood stars but to their fans after nearly 20 + years of not seeing them in anything it was a pleasant surprise.Also the old woman who plays Mrs Leeds was an extremely creepy old Italian woman who would've made a great witch & the daughter in the pigtails is one of the most nightmarish characters i've seen in a long time.You can obviously tell director Dante Tomaselli grew up on B-horror from his video store from the 80's as this film has that type of feel to it all the way through. Their are some seriously ridiculous moments in this film,like why would the cop HAVE TAKEN the girl back to the house where her whole family was murdered without any back-up?He wouldn't! And towards the end it seemed like they were running out of script ( or money) but this was a unexpected delight as if it sucks really bad i usually turn it off within the first 5 mins. And believe me there is a lot of horror out there you'll turn off cause it's so bad.Loved the scene where the old Mrs Leeds character was doing rails of cocaine but another question?Where did she get the coke from?Stolen from a dead victim? The SAatanists? The jersey Devil? LOL! But this film is good B-movie fun & Liked it immensely.*** OUT OF *****

I don't know if I should have added a warning about spoilers, but that's because I couldn't find a point to this movie at all! Seriously,I don't know what I'd be spoiling? The characters must have had some point, but I couldn't find it, and I will not subject myself to watching this train wreck ever again! Maybe you need to be part of a satanic order of sorts? The most shocking thing is this movie found distribution! If 0 was a score, I would have given this pearl a minus 10! Im sure anyone not associated with the film, that have seen it will agree! But if you don't please let me know what the hell this film was about! This film is one for the Twilight Zone!

3 1/2 stars. With SATAN'S PLAYGROUND (Anchor Bay), filmmaker Dante Tomaselli uses a traditional drive-in movie story as a way to anchor the hallucinogenic style of his previous films. This tale of a vacationing family lost in the woods, assaulted by a supernatural entity and a freaky backwoods clan, is "old fashioned," as Tomaselli says on his commentary, "but laced with LSD." Running a taut and feverish 81 minutes, this visually striking throwback to 1970s horror classics was shot in 1.85:1 widescreen (16x9-enhanced here) and the atmosphere of dread is immeasurably aided by highly evocative Dolby Digital 5.1 audio. Tomaselli draws strong performances from genre heroines Felissa Rose and Ellen Sandweiss as potential victims and Texas Chainsaw Massacre hitchhiker Ed Neal as one of the crazies, which only adds to the retro feel. Even though Tomaselli clearly loves The Evil Dead and frequently tips his hat, his portrait of a dysfunctional family under pressure feels personal and sometimes scathing. It's never artsy for its own sake, though, and can just as easily be enjoyed as a spooky funhouse ride -- a character's paranoid walk down a hallway toward a secret room is a nailbiter that builds to a brutally abrupt jolt. While his commentary and an on camera interview with Tomaselli reveal him as a passionate genre filmmaker, the behind-the-scenes featurette is unfortunately an uninspired puff piece. For a more in-depth look at the director, we'll have to wait for Christopher P.Garetano's upcoming documentary The Horror of Dante Tomaselli (trailered here) - - but until then, this DVD is a fine addition to a strong filmmaker's growing body of work.

What a mess. And I had good feelings, too, after the first five minutes. After a competent, simple POV attack scene I waited with baited breath, anxiously pondering what horrific form the Jersey Devil would take, what terrible possibilities a film like this could play with . . . and the monster totally dropped out of the movie. The next twenty minutes consisted of three people in a car being "dramatic". Still, I thought, ol' Jersey D can't be far away, eh? No. I'm not even gonna lead you on anymore. After the "character" scenes the movie lurches into a load of bushwah about a psychotic backwoods family and a satanic cult, but you shouldn't bother taking notes, because none of it goes anywhere. At all. It's a completely empty movie, no motivation, no story, not even any scares. You could rearrange all of the scenes and it wouldn't make a damn bit of difference. And the Jersey Devil stays a POV shot the whole film. But hey, that's "nightmare logic" for you, right? Right?No, it's crap, and Dante Tomaselli should be called out on it. A bad movie's still bad, even if you can wax philosophic about it on your commentary track, and a movie with no plot can't get away with "nightmare logic" (director's words) if there's nothing else for it to fall back on.