The Beast with a Million Eyes (1955)

The "Beast" is an alien we never see,who telepathically talks to earthlings.He doesn't have a million eyes,his "space ship,as you call it"(the best alien line ever)makes an ear piercing sound that makes all the animals(and dumber humans) his slaves.It starts with a stuffed bird bouncing off a windshield and the wackiness continues with a dog that gingerly smashes a door in with its snout. The aliens need our planet for some reason that I can't remember but 4 people in the desert show them that humans are too strong to be taken over. Instead of doing the "long quiet walk" time killer, they have some story about this dumb family that makes no sense. The last minute of the movie sees a horrible attempt at comedy and then we learn a lesson. This review was less confusing than the movie. This review was deleted for no reason and they say I have to change stuff.

The movie starts out with a pronouncement from some alien presence that he/it is going to take over the world, piece by piece, creature by creature. He manages to rein in a German shepherd and a cow, but the humans seem to be a lot more complicated. A family of three are living in a house in some desert area, growing something (not quite sure what). The guy's wife is fed up with their desperate condition and longs for her lost youth. Their daughter (no great prize as film stars go) wants to go to college but mom is filled with hatred for her unlimited potential. They also have a large man of limited mental capacity (and mute as well) helping them on the farm. He lies on his back in his room and looks at magazines. He also follows the girl to the swimming hole when she gets into her bathing suit. They have determined he is harmless and treat him much like the German shepherd. One day a high whiny sound is heard and the glassware and china is broken. Suddenly the animals become vociferous, attacking their owners. Apparently the problem is a Proctor-Silex percolator that is sending out signals. By influencing the animals and the slow guy, they will take over the house in the desert. Well, I suppose one needs to start small. This is every bit as bad as it sounds. The acting is horrible and there are really no special effects. Let this one drift off into space.

While this is a very low budget film, a bit of editing would have helped, and there are several continuity mistakes it has a interesting plot line and some of the acting is good, I just watched it for the first time since I was a kid and I enjoyed seeing Paul Birch again. While not a great film it does bring out some of the feelings of the mid 50s about who we are and what makes us human. As noted in other reviews there are a lot of mistakes, for fun try to find them, the biggest problem was not making enough use of the different treats and showing way too much running back and forth. But with only 6 actors they had to fill with something.

Now it is very easy to lambaste this film for so many things. The cheesy special effects(where reviewers have compared the alien spacecraft to a percolator or tea kettle)or how about the cloth birds thrown at Paul Birch's car. That is the extent of the special effect except of course for the "horrifying" finale where the mastermind is revealed. Somebody pinch me so I do not relive that horror another moment. Okay, let's get real. What about the animals - real, live animals - which are supposedly mad and dangerous. A dog wagging it tail in attack mode? The dog looked liked it was being trained in real time and was about as dangerous as the chances of any actors in this film winning an Oscar. A mad bull suppose to be a milking cow moving on in an attack like molasses. Paper and cloth birds and an innocuous crow sitting in a date palm. Scary stuff. The story basically has some alien mastermind introduced at the film's beginning saying he will take over earth for his dying alien race by first mastering the simple minds of the animals and plants and then moving on to the human beings. Whilst its execution is anything but pretty, The Beast with a Million Eyes is really one of the first nature goes awry films - films like The Day of the Animals, Prophecy, Grizzly, and so on owe the film a little bit - okay, a micro-little bit, but it is one of the first of its kind. What does it have going for it? Honestly not much. Paul Birch is mediocre but at least can act. I wish I could say that about the other thespians but would choke if I tried. Lorna Thayer plays his wife with reckless over-acting. She was an actress of some note and today is best known as the waitress from Five Easy Pieces with the notorious chicken salad sandwich scene. Dona Cole plays the daughter Sandy and she is just awful - no wonder her film career was quite limited. Dick Sargent(the second Darren from Bewitched) and Leonard Traver as the hulking, mute, ax-wielding "Him" are barely serviceable. One minor surprise was seeing great silent film comedian Chester Conklin in a brief but satisfying role. He even gets to do a little shtick for us before his udderly ridiculous departure. I have one big question. Why would an alien mastermind trying to take over the world start on a barely populated date farm in the middle of nowhere. Nothing much here in terms of animal/plant/or human life? You can tell the movie was made on a shoe-string budget and has obvious, for many, irrevocable flaws. But despite all of these imperfections, I found the movie to have some heart and think we should all get together and give it some love. Paul Birch's character would be so happy with that.