The Canyons (2013)

You get to see Lindsay Lohan's ample bosom in this movie. I can think of a single other redeeming quality.

I will not regurgitate the story line of this horrendous clunker of a film, The Canyons; there are many reviews outlining this stark, confusing and confounded movie, so I won't bore anyone with a redundant rehashing of this freakishly odd, depraved and lackluster bomb. All I can offer are a few, hopefully non-cruel notes on the sad fate of it's pathetic, washed up lead actress, Lindsy Lohan. Oops, so much for not being cruel. This film (more like student made video) is a true life commentary on the pitfalls and repercussions of allowing oneself to drug and drink her way into oblivion as Miss Lohan has apparently and unfortunately done. This once beautiful and talented young actress was teetering at the precipice of super stardom; now, she is a terribly aged has-been addict who has run her career and life down the proverbial tube. We have watched in horror, and perhaps morbid curiosity, as this young woman has circled the drain and finally sunk into a virtual abyss of failure, and in the end, written herself into the annals of infamy. It's a very depressing sight to behold. In this instance, art really does imitate life. Well, at least REALLY bad art. Lindsy accepted a role befitting a faded and torn painting of her own life. Maybe she took a major turn at Method Acting. Maybe she could truly see herself mirrored in her character. Maybe this putrid film is another note in her real life swan song. Maybe The Canyons is so hard to watch because I actually see a glimpse of the real Lindsy Lohan in a more heartbreaking light. Then again, maybe I am just trying to justify the very existence of this crud-fest in my own philosophical way.

The negative reviews of this film are incredible. Watching it without preconceptions, however, is probably essential. Both Lohan and Deen give stellar performances, the latter practically steals the film as the sadistic wealthy manipulator with long-standing mental issues who begins to seriously unravel when his sense of power over others is disrupted by his seemingly weak paramour. Deen wisely underplays it, with considerable subtlety, avoiding any suggestion of camp and thereby becomes quite realistically and quietly menacing. These two actors carry the film with enough skill to make it believable. In some ways reminiscent of "Gone Girl", but far more effective and meaningful than that over-rated, far more popular film. This work will eventually come into recognition for its merits. In the meantime, hopefully we will see more great work from both talented Lindsay Lohan and the new leading man with photogenic charisma, James Deen.

I will be honest here gone are the days of 90s when we used to have great soft core films i still love those plus the cast used to be filled with some of the hottest women in the world i can name a few like Shannon Tweed,Shannan Leigh,Gabriella hall or even Rochelle Swanson but now its a new era where people prefer action & guns over sexy women the director Paul Schrader tried to blend some of that 90s stuff for todays audience but failed to realize that soft-core and hardcore films do exist even today launching it into a theatrical release using one biggest star Lindsay Lohan will not make it a success.The Plot:the story is about Christian a strange film producer who gets mad and chooses path of violence when he finds out about the affair between cast members Tara and Ryan.There was no strong base in the story it offers nothing new that we haven't seen before also this triangular love story is really becoming useless,old,boring and uninteresting the actors did not have much to do here the script never allowed the characters but if you are looking for some nudity and hot sexy scenes there is only one epic scene in the start of the film with Tenille Houston it is amazingly shot.The Cast:Lindsay Lohan got wasted here & James Deen is a porn actor but he did better then many actors but the only great lady worth looking in this film is Tenille Houston she got the looks plus good dialog delivery sadly she is not famous i loved her performance & will be looking forward to more of her films.Overall this project took itself too seriously and became hilarious at many points it will kinda remind you of wild things series so my rating for The Canyons 2013 is 4/10.