Journey to the Center of the Earth (2008)

Well, of course, this one's bad. Not as bad as other "Asylum"-movies, though. My luck was I first watched it with German dub. The voices seem to fit better to the characters and lets them act way better than in the "original". For a low budget movie, the monsters are okay, of course not on a ILM-level, but okay. You shouldn't expect too much out of this one, it's a lower-than-low-budget cheap c-movie rip-off of flicks like "Jurassic Park" or "Journey to the center of the earth". This one isn't made for movie critics, its made just for people like me who enjoy watching these cheap d-movies.So give it a try if you into cheap monster movies. You got nothing to lose: Dumb story, bunch o pretty nice gals, monsters, more monsters and monsters who go after these pretty gals. Oh, and did I mention the monsters? I think this one is rated so bad because it has become some kind of "standard" to bash the Asylum-movies, but this one really isn't as bad as "Megapiranha" or this VERY STUPID "Megashark"-thingy.

Some reviewers felt this mess was fun. Jeez. Their taste is in their mouth. This bore about boring to the center of the earth must have had Jules Verne spinning wildly in his grave. I found it at Wal-Mart and would love to get my $5 back. It is doubled with 100 Million BC, also with Greg Evigan. I enjoyed some of the '50s-60s schlock. They were fun. This was a ripoff. Less than 5 minutes of looking at a sick dinosaur with vocal cords, and a few minutes of a spider with gland problems, both phonier than Ma Bell. One more thing, the music was an outright steal from Phillip Glass. Action? None. It was talk-talk-talk, and stupid talk-talk-talk at that. The picture on the box has this really mean looking dinosaur. Evidently, he was cut out of the movie. Fred Flintstone's Dino was far more convincing. It is advertised as a Maximum Movie Experience. They should be sued for false advertising. The girls were good looking and a couple of them could be classified as actresses. Appearing in this piece of junk is no way to further a career. Does Michelle have any words of advice for her sister --- like----keep away from this tripe? You get the picture. Don't get this picture.

Had I known this film was made by The Asylum, I would have passed it by. The plot, if you can call it that, was ripped off from "The Core" and "Star Trek". It concerns a teleportation devise that instead of sending it's passengers to Stuttgart, Germany, lands them in the center of the Earth. The remainder of the film involves the feeble and unbelievable rescue attempt, which isn't even worth discussing. The sets were totally unconvincing, as in various scenes a blue sky, clouds and even the Sun are visible. Indoor scenes were obviously filmed inside a warehouse and the special effects are pathetic even by 1950's standards. As for the script, I've seen more creative writing on the walls of public bathrooms. The producers had to really try hard to assemble a cast as talentless as this one. Better performances have been exhibited by corpses. The scantily clad females run around in sheer panic while the males try to appear robust and masculine, but fail miserably. If you suffer from insomnia definitely rent this film, if you want to be entertained, rent the original with James Mason.

By every account this is a terribly bad movie. Why do I give it so many stars (well, 4 out 10)? Because the cheese factor kind of works in it's favor ... for me. It's got some sort of sick charm that appeals to 1 out of every 50 people and I guess I'm that 1 person.Given that in 2008, 2 other Journey to the Center of the Earth movies were made (one Theatrical, one for the Hallmark TV channel) ... what spin could this one take? An all-female cast for starters (well, there is one slightly older middle-aged guy present, but he doesn't count), and teleportation to add a little novelty.Here's the setup: a military team of women are using a relatively new teleportation machine to zip over to Germany. Their path takes them through the center of the Earth (well, only 600km deep) ... and something goes wrong and they get stuck in said location. The hot female scientist who designed the machine is now just finished work on a nuclear-powered, laser-blasting deep digging machine. This is what's used to rescue the lost women.Part of the cheese factor for me is that in spite of a low budget, ridiculous cast and idea and clear special effects goofs (I don't think we're meant to see clouds underground) ... everyone in the movie tries to be serious. The result is a kind of offbeat amusement. In fact, I'm actually pretty impressed that the film makers didn't go the "T&A" route; the girl with the lip-ring in the beginning almost gets you thinking otherwise.Anyway, I do not recommend watching this movie. However, if you believe that you may happen to like knucklehead adaptations of "Journey to the ..." movies, then by all means check it out. I kind of liked it.