Mega Shark vs. Mecha Shark (2014)

My son who is six years old thought this was the dumbest and stupidest movie Hes ever seen in his life

Mega Shark vs. Mecha Shark (2014) BOMB (out of 4) Once upon a time we were given GODZILLA VS. MECHA GODZILLA but The Asylum has delivered a giant killer shark vs. a man-made steel shark. That's pretty much the only storyline that you need as we have a giant real shark doing damage so the government creates a mechanical shark to go after it. Oh yeah, Christopher Judge and Elizabeth Rohm play a couple trying to kill the real shark. This is the third film in the series and perhaps I'm just growing tired of them but I really, really, really hated this movie with a strong passion. Yes, the first two films in the series were bad but so are countless other "one giant vs. another giant" movies. I really don't expect great acting, award-winning direction or anything of good quality but I do hope to be entertained at the very least. A lot of times these movies are entertaining simply because they're just downright fun and know not to that themselves very seriously. Sadly, that's not the case here as the screenplay, direction and everything else is so serious and so over-dramatic that you really have to wonder if anyone had ever seen one of these films before. Why on Earth this thing was made so boring, so dramatic and so unfunny is beyond me but there's just not a single second of this film that's entertaining. Even worse is that the movie doesn't really feature any good kill scenes with the two monsters and instead of action scenes we're given really bad dialogue sequences that just drag on and never go anywhere. The performances are what you'd expect from a movie like this so I'm not going to blame the actors too much. The direction certainly isn't all that memorable and especially with some downright awful and horrendous slow-motion sequences, which just made me want to hit the stop button. Again, if you're going to make a low-budget monster movie like this, don't forget you're making a low-budget monster movie. Those who view these want to have fun.

Jack Turner and Rosie Gray are a couple who are proofing a submarine/AI system that is shaped like a shark. That is the Mecha Shark. The AI is 'Nemo,' a voice-only character.The world is a tizzy about rampant megalodons; those would be the Mega Sharks. So, there is at least one Mega Shark that is headed to Australia, to an ancestral mating ground. Great.In the midst of all this macro-disaster, there is a little girl looking to stay hidden from her mother. This is some joke that the screenwriter apparently thought was funny. Guess again. That somehow snags Rosie's efforts.The Mecha Shark has an amphibious mode. Nero gets lost in cyberspace, and the shark becomes just as big a problem as Mega Shark.Will Mecha Shark stop reaping destruction in Australia? Will the Mega Shark get put down? Will Elisabeth and Christopher get into some better movies and stay out of this sort of nonsense? -----Scores-----Cinematography: 5/10 There are some nice aerials and shots of US naval vessels. The CGI is hit or miss, mostly miss.Sound: 2/10 Mostly not a factor, but the background music is truly poor.Acting: 4/10 I liked Elisabeth Roehm in American Hustle and Law and Order. I liked Christopher Judge in Stargate SG1. Debbie Gibson was her usual bubbly self. Past those three, we had performances that are beneath amateurish. Even the veterans must have had a tough time not barfing at the bad dialog.Screenplay: 2/10 Poor dialog. The script has about 15 minutes of story spread over 85 minutes.

Well, after the previous huge successes, "Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus" and "Mega Shark vs Crocosaurus", the world does of course need a third installment; enter "Mega Shark vs Mecha Shark".Have you seen any of the previous two movies, then you know exactly what you are getting into here. Yeah, it is just that innovative and inspiring.When I saw the movie cover, I immediately thought of the old "Godzilla vs. Mecha Godzilla" movie, for some reason.The story is about a gargantuan megalodon shark being thawed out from its icy imprisonment, by the folly of human hands, of course. Freed from imprisonment, the waters become unsafe for everyone and everything as the megalodon got a hunger that seems to never end. Luckily, the navy is testing a prototype underwater submarine shark-like creation, and it is up to two people to put a stop to the megalodon before it is too late.Right, very original script here, and amazingly well-thought through. This is about as cliché and stereotypical as it can get for a movie of this type.But still, it is so cheesy and campy that it was fun to watch a single time. And trust me, a single time is all that you will watch this movie.The acting in the movie was, as in the previous movies, adequate, but nothing out of the ordinary.The effects... Well, let's just say that they weren't too bad, but nor were they impressive. The megalodon looked alright and was actually nicely enough animated. The metallic shark-like submarine, however, was a different matter at times, though.Well, "Mega Shark vs Mecha Shark" is everything you would expect from a movie of this type. Watch at your own peril...