Mama Dracula (1980)

When I initially heard about Mama Dracula and read the premise I immediately thought of the Carry On films. I expected a camp Carry On Screaming knock off set around Countess Elizabeth Bathory. Truth be told that's what it tries to be but sadly lacks the talented cast, the charm and the humour that was essential to the Carry On movies success.Featuring a terrible generic story line, viciously annoying characters, jokes that fall flat and some dire dialogue this is everything I'd hoped it wouldn't be.I get the impression the vampire twins were supposed to be the true stars who steal each scene but truth is the movie dropped in my opinion every time they appeared as they offered little beyond face palms & cringe inducing moments.If you seek horror, keep looking. If you seek comedy, you won't find any here. If you seek something that quite frankly isn't far off deserving a place in IMDb's bottom list, you've found what you're looking for.

Obviously I had nothing to do with this production, and actually it was released before I was even born, but still I somewhat feel the necessity to apologize to all the poor people who – like myself – struggled their way through this film and literally hated every single minute of it. Why? Because I'm from Belgium and apparently so is this miserable excuse for a horror movie! There aren't too many horror films being made in Belgium, but judging by the quality of "Mama Dracula", that's maybe a good thing. This is supposed to be a horror comedy, but we all know what the main problem with these flicks is… They're not scary and they're definitely not funny! Some of the basic ideas in the script definitely show potential (like the spin on the Countess Bathory legend), but the film is unendurably tedious, imbecilic and embarrassing. It's a complete mystery how Louise Fletcher ended up in such an inferior Belgian film production, barely five years after winning an Oscar for one of the greatest motion pictures ever made, but luckily enough she stills keeps her dignity. Fletcher plays the title role, but perhaps they couldn't pay her enough, as her role definitely isn't the leading part. She's a posh vampire who requires bathing in the blood of young virgins in order to maintain her beauty. The problem nowadays, however, is that virgins are becoming quite rare in this indecent day and age. She therefore orders to kidnap the young scientist Dr. Van Bloed, as he's on the verge of achieving a breakthrough with his synthetic blood formula. The jokes – if you can even refer to them like that – solely revolve on a handful of totally insufferable characters. The horrible vampire twin brothers are the absolute worst, closely followed by a police inspector who yells out "sabotage" all the time, and the young dorky scientist. "Mama Dracula" is hectic and irritating, with a plot that continuously jumps back and forth between semi-processed plot ideas and lame gags. The twins own (or perhaps just work) in a fashion store where they kidnap young girls from the cubicles. These sequences aren't very important, but I want to mention them nevertheless because at least they featured some nudity. Horrible movie, avoid at all costs … and once more my most sincere apologies in case you already had the displeasure of seeing it.

... doesn't mean that you should.And few films seem to exemplify that more than this one.I gave it 1 star because: 1) there wasn't anything lower available to give it here other than 0 stars, and it ain't getting off that easy, and 2) I did enjoy some of the music in the movie (when it wasn't trying to sound 'comical' when the twin vampires were doing whatever the heck it is they're doing while the cameras were rolling... it sure wasn't anything funny, that's for sure.) So, I gave it 1 star for some of the music. It's still probably 1 star more than it deserved, though.The lead actress is Louise Fletcher who went on to portray Kai Winn in Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. I probably should go back and give it an extra star just for her... but that would probably cause people to think that I enjoyed this... thing... more than I didn't. And that would be the same as lying; and I don't want to be called a liar.Vampire fans - If it was at all possible to drive a stake through the heart of a movie, I would gladly volunteer my services to do so in order to save the rest of you from ever stumbling across this rancid pile of guano.Louise Fletcher fans - Watch something else which you will be able to enjoy her performing in, because this just ain't it.In all, it was 90 minutes of my life which I shall never see again, and countless brain cells which I could've killed off with a good beer buzz, instead. I wish that I had a beer buzz right now; maybe it would help me forget this.Okay, I don't see anything that qualifies as a spoiler in here, so I won't check-mark that box. It's impossible to spoil this movie any more than the director, writers and actors already did. In fact, this movie is so spoiled that it probably should be thrown out with the wilted lettuce and that expired milk carton in the fridge.It's just... that... bad.

Decidedly off-beat, farcial, incomprehensible story about Countess Dracula(an Elizabeth Bathory type that keeps young bathing in the blood of young, female virgins - or as she says "wirgins")and her two vampire sons who run a clothing story called Vamp and have enlisted the aid of a young, American professor of blood. While there is no denying that the film is really going for your funny bone rather than your jugular, much of the humour is hit and miss(mostly miss) akin to a nurse with poor eyesight trying to find a vein with a needle. Academy Award winning actress Louise Fletcher plays Mama Dracula with subtle humour, grace, and charm and looks quite stunning in much of the fashion, but she has virtually nothing to work with in this Belgian horror comedy that relies more on two vampire son boobs for much of the film's motivation. The Wajnberg brothers, Marc-Henri and Alexander, are two strange men indeed. They look quite ridiculous, act even more so, and, despite such elementary things as gaping and running about like two school children much of the time, have glimpses of talent. There is one scene with them doing a pantomime which I rather liked, but the story, the rest of the actors, the less than inspiring direction make this film a far more arduous thing to sit through. Much of the failure of the film must be squarely put on the shoulders of director Boris Szulzinger and his adolescent prowess at showing virtually nothing resembling horror. We see a quite impressive castle with impressive sets, but maybe total three shots of any blood at all - all nothing more than a prick-size bleed. No one is bit on stage so to speak. There are lots of girls showing us their breasts but no action otherwise. The humour is pretty stale stuff too. I like a good horror parody...OK, this is nothing like a good horror parody...but Mama Dracula just doesn't mange to do what a good horror parody does: blend comedy and horror together so as to create something that could be labeled as both legitimately. this film has only Dracula in the title and some scenarios that revolve around the concept of a bloodsucker - beyond that it is nothing more than a mild European sex comedy. Poor Louise Fletcher - she really does and did deserve more than this.