The Invisible Man's Love Life (1970)

"Who sent for me to see the master of the house?" asks Dr. Garondet (Frances Valladares). "Don't ask me," replies the surly menial. "Then who should I ask?" persists the doctor. "Me," replies the menial.Some of the English dubbing occasionally threatens to tip this French/Spanish horror film into farce. Such ill-advised dialogue never gets a hold though, and it is entirely possible to enjoy this effective mad-scientist story. Orloff is played by Jess Franco veteran Howard Vernon, who once again is excellent in this mad-eyed role. Director Pierre Chevalier might lack the imagination of Franco, but his straightforward style makes great use of the locations and doesn't shy away from various unnecessary scenes of young ladies disrobing.Garondet is called out in a storm-lashed night to the mysterious Orloff's tremendously Gothic château. Such is the ferocity of the storm that Garondet stays the night in the company of Orloff, his allegedly deranged daughter Cécile (Brigitte Carva) and the invisible man/creature Orloff has created.The story seems a kind of mix of Dracula (Garondet's trip to the castle is more than a nod to the classic vampire story) and Frankenstein, with Orloff as the insane experimenter. With an invisible ape-man thrown in, we end up with a weird and not unenjoyable tapestry of horror elements, with wonderfully creepy Gothic tunnels and a hero with the most garishly red lined cloak. The invisible man-thing of the title isn't the focal point of the film until the final reel, his longest scene being the rape of the young housemaid in a stable (the sight of an invisible character indulging in the sex act has to be seen to be believed). This and his brief reveal are the film's most eccentric moments.This is a definite oddity. Jess Franco-esque, muddle headed and lacking a satisfying ending, this is what I suppose you might call classic Euro-horror from the 1970s. An ape-man with an insatiable desire for sex and mayhem is one thing, but an invisible one is a different budget-free ball game entirely.

Young Dr. Garondet (likable Paco Valladares) goes to the castle of batty Dr. Orloff (the always reliable Howard Vernon in peak sinister form). At the castle Garondet meets Orloff's daughter Cecile (lovely Brigitte Carva) and runs afoul of Orloff's dangerous invisible man experiment. Boy, does this gloriously ghastly atrocity possess all the right wrong stuff to qualify as a real four-star stinkbomb: we've got plodding misdirection by Pierre Chevalier, ragged editing, poor dubbing, a talky script, sluggish pacing, crude, zoom-happy cinematography by Juan Fortuny and Raymond Heil, paltry (not so) special effects (the invisible maniac turns out to be some zhlub in a hopelessly cheesy and unconvincing ape suit!), and a limply staged and unexciting fiery climax. Naturally, there's also a generous sprinkling of tasty gratuitous female nudity. This movie reaches its hilariously inept apex with a protracted sequence depicting the invisible maniac raping a hapless maid. The supporting cast flounder with the patently ludicrous script: Isabel Del Rio as the bitchy, greedy, treacherous Marie, Fernando Sancho as Marie's despicable weakling accomplice, and Evane Hanska as a surly servant. Extra kudos are in order for Camille and Claude Sauvage's wildly inappropriate, but still insanely groovy finger-snapping swinging jazz score. In fact, this flick is downright Jess Francoesque in its endearingly awful crumminess. A complete schlocky hoot.

Perhaps because I've seen this before it played slightly better this time. A doctor is summoned to a castle where no one will go. Once there no one will admit that they summoned him. It transpires that the daughter of Dr Orloff had summoned him because she was having odd experiences. It transpires that her father has made an invisible man (gorilla) and after a long rambling story in flashback about his the daughters near death, the doctor is locked up, escapes and the castle is blown up. Its at best 40 minutes of material stretched to almost twice that thanks to lots of sequences of people walking the country side, walking down corridors, just walking. It wouldn't be bad if you stripped all of the extra stuff away. Thankfully I was engaged in something else at the same time I was watching it so the tedium was relieved. Worth a look if you're a Eurohorror fan or like the idea of invisible gorillas.

I always assumed that it was Jess Franco who had a monopoly on this type of cinema, namely: the routine euro-exploitation flicks with an always-returning villain (Dr. Orloff), absurd story lines (invisible ape-creatures??), truckloads of sleaze and absolutely no logic at all. Every small detail in "Orloff Against the Invisible Man" has got Franco's name written all over it, so it was quite a surprise to find out that he actually hasn't got anything to do with it. But still Franco admirers don't have to fear that this will be a 'soft' film, because director Pierre Chevalier proves himself to be "Godfather of Sleaze" as well and his movie is delightfully trashy and nonsensical. Howard Vernon (normally a Franco-regular as well) stars as a totally insane man of science who created an invisible monster, supposedly for his daughter that got traumatized after being buried alive when she was 16. How exactly this creation helps the poor girl's situation is entirely beside the point, as are many other sudden twist in the script. Everything eventually revolves on the sexual aspect when the invisible ape-man goes completely berserk after graphically raping the housemaid (sickly illustrated by an overlong scene showing the poor woman struggling naked on a pile of hay). Every normal film-loving person will most likely detest this film, but for exploitation-fans, there is always the weird atmosphere and morbid set pieces to admire. Orloff's castle is genuinely ominous, with lots of dark cellars and secret tombs and Howard Vernon looks uniquely sinister again. Great entertainment for the slightly more demanding cult-freaks among us.