L.A.P.D.: To Protect And To Serve (2001)

A disgrace trying to be a mirror of the L.A.P.D. A few aging stars coasting through a terrible script. Dirty cops wanting to turn against other dirty cops. Cops that don't want to be cops. Unrealistic, over-kill on the gun fire. Front line cast is made up of: Dennis Hopper, Michael Madsen, Marc Singer and Charles Durning. A glimmer of promise from Kiara Hunter, Carolyn Dunn and Brenda Campbell. This movie can serve as background noise while passing around the party dip and refilling the cold refreshments. I guess there is no law for bad acting. Even the simulated sex is terrible.

A lot of my friends worked on this movie. They said there were tons of cop-movie in-jokes here and everybody would crack up between takes, with cast and crew having a good time during all those party scenes. They said Marc Singer (remember Beastmaster ?) was a really cool guy, Madsen laid back and Hopper (gettin' kinda' creaky in his way) but still stretching his chops. Its just a low-budget flick fer' gosh-sakes. Sincere in its ponderous way and way better than any million-dollar stinking Seagal or Stallone crap-shoot. Course you can bet your ass nobody was getting $20 million to star in this. Like, you all were expecting maybe "Miami Vice" ? Morally, I figure this flick is a hell of a lot better than some reprehensible 'fun' slasher-crap flicks that fanboys seem to eat up like so many catsup-dripping hotdogs. Hell, I bought this movie in a discount bin at Blockbuster, expecting the worst and surprised to get more than my money's worth. Charles Durning was pretty solid in this and the twist at the end was totally unexpected. And without a doubt, I agree with some of the other comments that the gals were definitely HOT ! This is just a freakin' low-budget movie with all the exploitation elements intact, and every dollar up on the screen. Controversial ? Not really. Amusing ? Yes. A good movie ? Well, better than a lot of the big-budget studio crap that's out there...

This was just utter crap. Usually if a movie is not that good I can watch it until the end, but for this movie I just couldnt last all the way. I had to stop it half way through. The two lead actors were so bad they sounded like robots talking to each other. I was also sucked in by the cover thinking that Madsen and Hopper were gonna be the main two leads. Ha - big mistake that was. One viewer already mentioned the scene with the fat cop chasing the hobbling homeless guy. I have never seen a more crappy and dumb scene as that. The way the fat cop runs, the fact that he is outran by the hobbling homeless guy, and that he shoots and misses him from a few feet. Unbelievable! That scene alone summarises the whole crappy movie.Also, a guy gets shot in the chest against a wall and from somewhere blood appears next to his head?!?! Figure that one. And a robber gets shot from behind, with the bullets going through his torso, and yet they just mysteriously vanish on the other side. Where did they go?? The only saving grace for this film was those hot goddesses at the parties. Where did they get these chicks? NEGATIVE 10 out of 10 from me!!

To Protect and Serve: Protect us the viewer and serve the acting to the dogs. Why oh Why did I rent this? Because of Dennis Hopper. After all, he has made some good films, even very good ones. I saw him on the cover, and instead of checking IMDB first, I took a chance. This trash is the Plan Nine from Outer Space version of modern law enforcement. If I were a LAPD employee, a LA criminal, a citizen of LA, even an alien from Mars, I would demand that all money used in this production be used to burn all copies of this wherever they may be. Considering the absolute total ineptness of the acting, directing, and writing efforts here, there may be only enough loose coin to burn just one copy. Dennis Hopper was in this for 3 maybe 4 minutes. And you could plainly see he was over acting. Dennis, do not add this to your filmography. This is a very, very bad film.