The Black Knight Returns (2009)

I could not make it through the first 2 minutes without turning it off. So this review is for the first 2 minutes only. 2/10 stars is sufficient to tell you:1) The movie is not worth the time I just wrote this. But I am writing this so that you will not watch more than the 2 minutes.2) If you believe this was a grade school assignment, then it is definitely merits 2 stars for sheer effort. 3) If anyone who was involved in creating, producing and selling this movie are to read this, please try doing something else for your own sake.

review scale inadequate for what i want ... 5 out of ten is averaging a 10-and-1 scorei actually enjoyed this beast and hope they do a sequel that maintains the awesome cool ... the incredible Chinese-opera fight scenes, the absolute tongue-in-cheek totality of the thing together with the curious sincerity of the soap opera ... dunno ... if this kind of thing is your bag, u want to see thisthat's it in a quick-food-to-go packbut to be posted i need 10 lines of text, the host site advisesso let me say further that they need to vamp the mad dichotomy vastly further, like the best of the cartoon world(s) or Vonnegut or Kafka or anyone when they're hot ... this baby got mid-warm on the average, but nevertheless with my very high overall praise special hat-tip to the human vocal qualityalso to the US$20,000 budget ... shot in the contemporary LA area ... good job, thatrepeat ... i seriously enjoyed this flick

It is sad that so few have posted so little. The movie, while being far below A quality,still reflects a few simple things. They were able to find funding. The people poking jibes about their kids being able to do better,or clowns could do better,should seek better employment to back up their claims. The main reviewer should don his make-up and get to work. It is easy to point and cast insults when your sitting on your backside,parked in front of a comp, and fisting Cheetos,all in the name of FILM NOIR!I found the movie lacking in several respects,but I also recognize that many directors have similar products,bad or poorly constructed, but still learn from such. Uwe Boll comes to mind.I do feel the film could have benefited from a bit more computer enhancement to say the least,but I have never found a reason to talk down on a director or actor because they lack skill. I do not have the skill nor aptitude to do better,I am sure nor do the other derogatory posters.I do hope the director has learned from his project and grows from it. It is sad that people who post responses to a movie cannot seem to do the same.

Easily the most awful movie made in years. Devoid of plot, good acting, intelligent writing, good action or even good-looking stars, one can only ask why this movie was made. With a threadbare plot based loosely on some kind of psychic rebirth of the Black Knight, who fights crime, the movie rambles on for nearly 90 minutes on nothing but the naked audacity of its makers. Any two clowns on the street could manage more realistic fight sequences than are staged here. The quality of this movie is not even bad-funny, just too bad for human viewing. As of this review, 7 viewers have, on average, managed to give this film just over 5 stars. I can only ask: are you kidding? A high school film class could easily best this effort. If I could have rated it zero, I would have. Do yourself a favor and forget you ever saw this title on IMDb.